I miss my fwb, why? what to do? (20 reasons and tips to handle the situation)

By: Naveen B

Friends with benefits (FWB) relationships can be complex, as they involve a unique blend of sexual intimacy and emotional detachment.

While the nature of these relationships is often understood to be casual and low-pressure, it is not uncommon to develop feelings of attachment towards a FWB.

This can lead to a variety of emotions, including confusion, frustration, and longing, especially if the arrangement has come to an end.

If you are wondering why do I miss my fwb so much? And If you find yourself longing for your FWB more than expected, you are not alone. In this blog post, we will explore why you may be experiencing these emotions and provide tips and strategies to help you navigate through them. 

By understanding the underlying causes of your emotions and taking practical steps to manage them, you can move forward with confidence and clarity, whether that means reconnecting with your FWB or moving on from the relationship altogether.

Why do I miss my fwb so much?

There are a variety of reasons why you may miss your friend with benefits (FWB) after the relationship has ended. Here are some potential reasons:

1. Attachment style:

Your attachment style may also influence how much you miss your FWB. If you have an anxious attachment style, you may be more likely to feel distressed when relationships end and have a harder time letting go.

If you have an avoidant attachment style, you may have a tendency to avoid emotional closeness and may feel more relieved than upset when the relationship ends.

2. Unresolved issues:

If the FWB relationship ended on unclear terms or if there were unresolved issues, it’s possible that you’re struggling to let go because you haven’t fully processed what happened or how you feel.

3. Lack of closure:

If you didn’t have a clear conversation or closure around the end of the relationship, you may be left with unanswered questions or feel like you didn’t get a chance to express yourself fully.

4. Emotional attachment:

FWB relationships can involve emotional intimacy, which can create a bond between the two people involved.

If you developed feelings for your FWB, it may be difficult to let go of that emotional attachment.

5. Limited social support:

If you don’t have a lot of close friends or social support, the end of a FWB relationship can feel especially difficult and isolating.

Also read: 50 Psychological effects of friends with benefits


6. Idealizing the relationship:

It’s possible that you’re remembering the FWB relationship more positively than it actually was, or that you’re idealizing the other person.

Remind yourself of the reasons why the relationship ended and the challenges or downsides of the relationship to help you gain perspective.

7. Comfort and familiarity:

If you were used to spending time with your FWB on a regular basis, it may be challenging to adjust to the change in routine and lack of companionship.

8. Fear of being alone:

If you don’t have other close connections in your life, the end of a FWB relationship may leave you feeling lonely or scared about the future.

9. Loss of physical intimacy:

FWB relationships involve physical intimacy, which can be a significant source of pleasure and connection. The loss of that physical connection can be challenging to cope with.

10. Nostalgia:

Sometimes, we miss things simply because they remind us of positive experiences or memories. If you had enjoyable experiences with your FWB, it’s natural to feel nostalgic about those times.

Also read: Can friends with benefits fall in love? Research says “Yes.”

I miss my fwb so much, what to do?

What to do I miss my friends with benefits so much? It’s understandable to miss your FWB after the relationship has ended.

FWB relationships can involve emotional attachment, physical intimacy, and a sense of comfort and familiarity. Here are some things you can do if you’re missing your FWB:

1. Acknowledge your feelings:

It’s okay to feel sad, lonely, or confused after the end of a FWB relationship. Allow yourself to feel and process your emotions.

2. Avoid contacting your former FWB:

While it can be tempting to reach out to your former FWB, it may be better to avoid contact for a period of time to allow yourself to heal and move on.

3. Focus on self-care:

Take care of yourself and engage in activities that bring you joy, such as exercise, spending time with loved ones, or pursuing hobbies.

4. Reflect on the reasons for the end of the FWB relationship:

Consider the reasons why the relationship ended and how you can apply those lessons to future relationships.

5. Seek support:

Talk to friends, family members, or a therapist if you’re struggling to cope with the end of the FWB relationship.

Also read: How to stop having feelings for a friend with benefits? (10 tips and strategies)


6. Identify unmet needs:

Sometimes, we miss our FWB because they fulfilled certain needs that aren’t being met elsewhere in our lives.

Consider what needs your FWB was fulfilling and explore ways to meet those needs in other ways, such as through other relationships, hobbies, or self-care activities.

7. Take responsibility for your own well-being:

While it’s natural to miss someone we were close to, it’s important to recognize that our own well-being is ultimately our responsibility.

Focus on taking care of yourself and meeting your own needs, rather than relying on someone else to fulfill them.

8. Practice self-compassion:

Be kind and compassionate to yourself as you navigate the end of the FWB relationship. 

Recognize that it’s a difficult and emotional process, and give yourself the space and time you need to heal.

9. Set boundaries:

If your FWB ended the relationship, it’s important to respect their decision and set boundaries around contact or communication. If you ended the relationship, you may need to communicate your boundaries clearly and stick to them to avoid confusion or mixed signals.

10. Consider the bigger picture:

While it can be hard to let go of a FWB, it’s important to remember that this is just one part of your life.

Try to focus on the bigger picture and recognize that there are many other experiences and relationships to be had in the future.

Remember that missing your FWB is a normal part of the grieving process, but it’s important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and respect the other person’s boundaries. With time and self-care, you can move forward and find new connections and experiences.

Also read: How to keep your fwb interested? (10 Steps and tips to follow)

Final thoughts:

In conclusion, missing a FWB can be a challenging and confusing experience, but it is important to remember that it is a normal and common occurrence.

By acknowledging your emotions and taking practical steps to address them, such as communicating openly with your FWB or seeking support from friends and family, you can gain a greater sense of clarity and peace of mind.

Ultimately, whether you choose to reconnect with your FWB or move on from the relationship, the most important thing is to prioritize your own emotional well-being and make decisions that are in your best interest.

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Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry. His expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few. To be updated with his latest work, connect with him by following his social media accounts.

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