How to stop having feelings for a friend with benefits? (10 tips and strategies)

By: Naveen B

When it comes to navigating relationships, having feelings for a friend with benefits can be a complex and challenging situation.

On one hand, you enjoy spending time with this person and the physical intimacy that comes with it.

On the other hand, you may find yourself developing romantic feelings and wanting something more.

Navigating these emotions can be difficult, and it’s important to prioritize your emotional well-being and make choices that align with your values and goals.

In this blog post, we’ll discuss how to stop having feelings for a friend with benefits and  explore 10 unique tips and strategies to get over your fwb.

These tips are based on the latest research in psychology and relationship dynamics, and are designed to provide you with practical guidance and insights.

Whether you’re looking to move on from a current FWB situation, or want to avoid catching feelings in the future, this post will provide you with a step-by-step guide to managing your emotions and gaining clarity on what you truly want in a relationship.

Each tip will be accompanied by real-world examples and questions to ask yourself, so you can apply these insights to your own situation.

At the end of the day, it’s important to remember that having feelings for a friend with benefits is a common experience, and you are not alone.

By using these tips and strategies, you can gain the tools and perspective needed to navigate this complex situation and move towards a healthier and more fulfilling relationship dynamic. So let’s dive in.

How to stop having feelings for a friend with benefits?

When it comes to navigating the emotional complexities of a friend with benefits relationship, it’s important to understand that the human brain is wired to form emotional connections and attachments with others.

This is why it’s not uncommon to develop feelings for a friend with benefits, even if both parties agree to keep the relationship strictly physical.

To begin with, it’s important to acknowledge and accept your feelings rather than trying to suppress them. Denying or ignoring your emotions will only lead to greater internal conflict and confusion.

Once you’ve accepted your feelings, it’s important to start reframing the relationship in your mind.

Instead of viewing your friend with benefits as a potential romantic partner, try to focus on the aspects of the relationship that are purely physical and enjoyable.

This might mean consciously reminding yourself of the reasons why you initially agreed to a friends with benefits arrangement, or focusing on the physical pleasure that the relationship provides.

Another important step is to start actively seeking out other sources of emotional connection and fulfillment.

This could mean spending more time with friends and family, pursuing hobbies and interests that bring you joy, or even exploring other romantic or sexual relationships.

By expanding your social and emotional support network, you’ll be better equipped to manage any feelings of attachment or longing that arise in your friend with benefits relationship.

It’s also worth considering whether a friends with benefits relationship is truly fulfilling your needs and desires.

If you find yourself consistently developing feelings for your friend with benefits, it may be a sign that you’re looking for something more meaningful and emotionally fulfilling.

In this case, it may be worth having an open and honest conversation with your friend about the possibility of exploring a more traditional romantic relationship.

Also read: How to go back to being friends after sleeping together? (10 Tips with examples)

How-to-stop-having-feelings-for-a-friend-with-benefits

10 Strategies and tips to stop having feelings for a friend with benefits

I understand that having feelings for a friend with benefits can be a complex and challenging situation. To help you navigate this situation, here are 10 Best strategies and tips to consider and get over your friends with benefits:

1. Explore the root cause of your feelings.

2. Create a symbolic object that represents your emotions.

3. Engage in radical honesty with yourself and your FWB.

4. Practice emotional detachment and compartmentalization.

5. Use sensory grounding techniques to stay present in the moment.

6. Create a vision board for your ideal future relationship.

7. Write a letter to yourself from the perspective of your future self.

8. Practice non-attachment and non-judgment towards your emotions.

9. Create a mantra to remind yourself of your goals and values.

10. Embrace the discomfort and use it as an opportunity for personal growth.

Let’s explore each tip in more detail:

1. Explore the root cause of your feelings:

Sometimes, our feelings towards our FWB are not actually about them, but rather a projection of our own unresolved issues.

Take time to reflect on why you are feeling the way you are and work to address the underlying causes.

Examples:

Are you seeking validation from this person because of a past rejection?

Are you using sex as a coping mechanism for anxiety or depression?

Questions to ask yourself:

What emotions am I experiencing and why?

What patterns have I noticed in my past relationships and how do they relate to this situation?

2. Create a symbolic object that represents your emotions:

Use a tangible object to represent your feelings towards your FWB. This can help you express and process your emotions in a healthy way.

Examples:

Create a collage of images that represent your emotions and display it in a private space.

Carry a small object with you that reminds you of your feelings, such as a special stone or piece of jewelry.

Questions to ask yourself:

What object would best represent my emotions?

How can I use this object to process and express my feelings in a healthy way?

Also read: Statistics of friends with benefits turning into a relationship (As per research, survey, study)

3. Engage in radical honesty with yourself and your FWB:

It can be tempting to suppress or hide our feelings, but this can ultimately make things worse. Instead, practice radical honesty with yourself and communicate openly with your FWB.

Examples:

Acknowledge your feelings to yourself and your FWB without expecting a certain outcome.

Share your boundaries and needs with your FWB, such as limiting physical touch or having more emotional intimacy.

Questions to ask yourself:

What am I afraid of when it comes to being honest with myself and my FWB?

How can I communicate my needs and boundaries in a way that feels respectful and honest?

4. Practice emotional detachment and compartmentalization:

This is a skill that can take time to develop, but it can be helpful in managing strong emotions towards your FWB.

Practice separating your emotions from the situation and compartmentalizing them.

Examples:

Create a mental “box” for your emotions and place them there when you are with your FWB.

Use mindfulness techniques to stay present in the moment and detach from your thoughts and emotions.

Questions to ask yourself:

How can I practice emotional detachment without suppressing my emotions?

What tools can I use to help me compartmentalize my emotions in a healthy way?

Also read: Your guide to ending fwb because of feelings (signs, reasons, tips)

5. Use sensory grounding techniques to stay present in the moment:

When we are caught up in our emotions, it can be difficult to stay present and grounded.

Use sensory grounding techniques to help you stay in the moment and avoid getting lost in your thoughts and emotions.

Examples:

Focus on your breath and count your inhales and exhales.

Take a moment to observe your surroundings and name things you see, hear, and feel.

Engage your senses by smelling something pleasant or holding something soft.

Questions to ask yourself:

What sensory grounding techniques work best for me?

How can I use these techniques to stay present and avoid getting caught up in my emotions?

Also read: Do friends with benefits kiss goodbye? on lips or forehead, what does it mean?

6. Create a vision board for your ideal future relationship:

Use a vision board to visualize what you want in a future relationship. This can help you clarify your values and what you are truly looking for in a partner.

Examples:

Cut out images and words from magazines that represent your ideal relationship and display them on a board.

Create a digital vision board using an online platform or social media.

Questions to ask yourself:

What are my values and priorities in a relationship?

How can I use this vision board to clarify what I want and move towards it?

7. Write a letter to yourself from the perspective of your future self:

Use this exercise to visualize yourself in the future and provide yourself with guidance and encouragement.

Examples:

Write a letter to yourself as if you are five years older and wiser.

Imagine yourself at the end of a successful relationship and write a letter to yourself from that perspective.

Questions to ask yourself:

What advice would my future self give me?

How can I use this exercise to gain clarity and motivation?

Also read: I ended my fwb will he be back (25 reasons he might come back)

8. Practice non-attachment and non-judgment towards your emotions:

Avoid getting caught up in your emotions and practice observing them without judgment or attachment.

Examples:

Practice meditation or mindfulness to observe your thoughts and emotions.

Use cognitive-behavioral therapy techniques to challenge negative thoughts and emotions.

Questions to ask yourself:

How can I observe my emotions without getting caught up in them?

What techniques can I use to challenge negative thoughts and emotions?

9. Create a mantra to remind yourself of your goals and values:

Use a positive affirmation or mantra to remind yourself of your goals and values.

Examples:

“I am worthy of love and respect.”

“I prioritize my emotional well-being and set healthy boundaries.”

Questions to ask yourself:

What positive affirmation resonates with me?

How can I use this mantra to stay focused on my goals and values?

10. Embrace the discomfort and use it as an opportunity for personal growth:

Rather than trying to suppress or avoid uncomfortable emotions, embrace them as an opportunity for personal growth.

Examples:

Use journaling or creative expression to explore your emotions and gain insights.

Seek out new experiences or challenges that push you outside of your comfort zone.

Questions to ask yourself:

How can I use discomfort as an opportunity for personal growth?

What new experiences or challenges can I seek out to facilitate growth?

Also read: 50 Friends with benefits boundaries (Importance and tips to set healthy fwb boundaries)

Final thoughts:

In conclusion, having feelings for a friend with benefits can be a challenging situation to navigate. 

However, by using these unique tips and strategies, you can gain clarity, manage your emotions, and ultimately move towards a healthier and more fulfilling relationship.

Remember, it’s okay to seek professional help if needed and to prioritize your emotional well-being.

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Author
Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry. His expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few. To be updated with his latest work, connect with him by following his social media accounts.

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