Checklist before getting into a relationship (healthy relationship checklist)

Dating can be an exciting time. Getting to know someone, but not knowing for sure if you’ll hit it off with them is one of the best parts of dating.

But once you do get into a relationship, your life will never be quite the same. A couple of dates in, you’ll wonder if you made the right decision to go out with them or even of getting into a relationship at all.

Without a doubt, getting into a relationship is a big decision. It involves two people becoming one, and that can be scary. It’s not something to do on a whim, which is why you need this checklist before getting into a relationship.

In this article, I’ve broken down Checklist before getting into a relationship and a healthy relationship checklist every couple must have and follow from the first date to moving into marriage.

Checklist before getting into a relationship



You should be ready to have a relationship before getting into one. You should have enough self-awareness to know what you want and need in a partner, and enough self-confidence to ask for it.

You should be able to handle the ups and downs of a relationship, from excitement to conflict and everything in between. And most importantly, you should want all of that — not just some parts of it, but all of it.


Love is the most important ingredient in any relationship, but it’s not necessarily what makes the relationship work.

You can be in love with someone and still be miserable together. You can be in love with someone who doesn’t love you back, or who doesn’t love you enough.

You need to ask, Is this person someone you love? Do you feel like there’s a deep connection between you two? If not, it could be time to move on.


You should share common values with your potential partner, and feel comfortable talking about what’s important to both of you.

If you don’t see eye-to-eye on things like religion or politics, that’s okay — but if neither of you is willing to compromise on those issues (including things like whether or not you plan on having kids), then maybe this isn’t the right person for you after all.


Self-awareness means knowing what makes you tick and what ticks people off about you. It also means knowing how other people perceive you and how they feel about your personality traits and behavior.

Having self-awareness allows you to adapt your behavior so that it fits in better with other people’s expectations, which makes them more comfortable around you and thus increases their desire to get closer to you.

In addition, self-awareness helps prevent those “I never knew I did that!” moments when someone calls you out on something that they’ve noticed but never told you about before.

Because they didn’t want to hurt your feelings by pointing out something negative about yourself.


You should be able to stand on your own two feet and not depend on anyone else for money or emotional support.

You need to be self-sufficient, but also know when it’s okay to ask for help from others.

A healthy relationship is one in which both partners are able to give and receive love freely without feeling like they are being used or taken advantage of by their partner.


Communication is the key to any successful relationship, whether it’s with friends or family members, or romantic partners — but especially so when it comes time for conflict resolution.

If there are problems brewing underneath the surface, they need to come out now so that both people can deal with them before they get worse over time (and possibly lead to an argument).

If you don’t know how to communicate with your partner, then you won’t have a successful relationship.

Communication skills include listening, asking questions, avoiding judgmental words (e.g., “always”), using active listening techniques (e.g., paraphrasing), using “I” statements instead of “you” statements (e.g., “I feel sad when we argue”), being honest with yourself and your partner, etc.


Clarity is about knowing yourself well enough to know what you want out of life and from this relationship — and then communicating those things clearly to your partner so that both of you have an idea of what the other expects from the relationship.

It can be easy to fall into relationships because we’re lonely or have been hurt before by another person we loved dearly.

But don’t let yourself make these mistakes again! Make sure that both of you are clear on what exactly this relationship means before moving forward with any commitment or expectations of future plans together.


An adult relationship requires maturity and responsibility. This means you’re responsible for yourself and your partner, but also for your family and friends.

You need to be mature enough to handle the responsibilities of being in a serious relationship. You should be able to communicate with your partner about important issues and problems that may arise during the course of your relationship.

Boundaries (Personal space)

Boundaries are an important part of any healthy relationship. They allow each person to maintain his or her individuality or personal space while still enjoying time spent together as a couple.

When there are no boundaries between two people, it can lead to resentment, jealousy, and even abuse in some cases.

Boundaries help keep your relationship healthy and strong. We all need boundaries in our lives; without them, we become vulnerable and more likely to be affected by toxic people or situations around us.

Learn how to set healthy boundaries with your partner so that they know where they stand with you at all times, while also allowing yourself room to grow and learn as an individual.


Commitment means being willing to go out on a limb for someone else’s benefit as much as your own.

It means caring more about their happiness than your own and doing whatever it takes to make them happy.

Before getting into a relationship, it’s important to know if you and the other person is ready to commit their time and energy to it as well. If one person isn’t committed, then it won’t work out for the long term anyway.


Honesty is critical in any relationship because it allows each partner to trust the other person completely and feel safe when sharing their feelings with them.

If one partner lies about something important like money or previous relationships/s#xual history, then it can lead to mistrust between them and ultimately destroy the relationship over time if they aren’t willing to come clean about what happened in the past when asked about it honestly by their current partner.

Honesty is essential in any relationship because it allows both partners to trust each other and build a strong foundation for their relationship.

If you can’t be honest with your partner, then you will have a hard time making him/her happy and vice versa.

You also need to be honest with yourself so that you don’t deceive yourself into thinking that he/she is the only person who can satisfy all of your needs just because he/she makes you feel happy and secure at the moment.


The most important thing in a relationship is trust and communication between two people who love each other unconditionally and respect each other’s boundaries.

If you don’t have trust, then there can’t be any real love or commitment between two people.

Because if one person has no trust or respect for the other person then he or she will treat that person as if he or she were just another object in his or her life rather than as a human being with needs and feelings like his or hers own needs and feelings

Trust is one of the most important ingredients needed in order for a relationship to work well over time.

Without trust, it’s difficult if not impossible for two people to feel comfortable enough around each other so they can relax and simply enjoy being together without worrying about what the other person might do next or how he or she will react when something happens unexpectedly (for example).

Money/Financial stability

One of the most important things that people look for in their life partner is financial stability. If you are planning to get married, then this factor should be taken into consideration.

It is important to know if your partner has enough money to support both of you and his family. If he does not have any money, then it means that he cannot support anyone at all and hence it would not be an ideal match for you as well.

Another major thing that comes into play here is his ability to make money without compromising on time with his family or friends.

You need a man who knows how to balance work and life so that he can spend time with his family when needed and vice versa when required. This way both of you will remain happy together for many years together.


Being responsible means being able to take care of yourself and your partner. If you are not responsible for your own well-being, it’s likely that you will not be able to provide the same for someone else.

A good test is to ask yourself if you can handle a crisis on your own or with help from others. If you cannot do this, then it is likely that you need more time to develop your ability to take responsibility before getting into a relationship.

Being responsible means having to be accountable for your actions. It means being able to live with the consequences of your choices and decisions, regardless of how others might react. It means being accountable to yourself, first and foremost.


Being open means that you are able to share your thoughts, feelings, emotions and opinions with your partner without having any reservations or hesitations whatsoever about doing so.

Because you know that whatever you say won’t be taken as an insult or an offense by him/her but rather as a way for both of you to grow closer together as individuals and as a couple as well.


Loyalty is another important quality because it shows commitment toward another person and their feelings even when they are at their worst times in life and are struggling with personal issues or suffering from something traumatic like an illness.

Ask yourself these questions before getting into a relationship:

Do you love yourself? Do you know what makes you happy? Do you like who you are when you’re with this person? If not, why would you want to spend time with that person?

Trust your instincts

This is the most important thing to do before getting into a relationship. You have to trust your instincts.

They are there for a reason and they will always lead you in the right direction. If something feels wrong, it probably is wrong. If you feel like something isn’t right, then it probably isn’t right either.

If something feels off, it probably is — especially if it’s happened before or when other red flags were raised in previous relationships.

Take time to get to know someone

There’s nothing wrong with taking some time before getting into a relationship.

Because it allows you to get to know someone better and see if they are truly worth spending your time on. It also gives you an opportunity to figure out if you want this person in your life or not.

If the two of you can’t spend at least three months together without fighting, then this person clearly isn’t worth it!

Don’t rush things

Rushing things can cause problems later on down the road so try not to rush things before getting into any kind of relationship.

You should take your time and make sure that both of you are ready for it.

Relationship checklist before marriage


Marriage is a big deal. And, as with any big decision, it’s important to know if you’re truly ready. But how do you know if you’re ready to say “I do” for the rest of your life?

It’s hard to know for sure whether or not you’re ready to commit to someone for the long haul.

But there are some signs that can help you gauge whether or not your relationship is headed in the right direction.

If you think about these things before getting married and make changes where necessary, your chances of a lasting marriage are much greater.

If you are planning to get married, it’s important to take the time to consider whether you’re truly ready for marriage. This checklist can help you evaluate if you’re ready to move forward with your relationship.

Here are 10 relationship checklist before marriage:

1. Check if you have a healthy attitude about s#x and intimacy

2. Check if you share similar core values and beliefs about life in general.

3. Check if you have common goals and interests

4. Check if you can provide emotional support when needed without being overly dependent on each other

5. Check if you both feel comfortable with each other’s families and friends

6. Check if you can discuss issues without blaming one another or getting defensive (and vice versa)

7. Check if your communication style is compatible; that means listening more than talking, asking questions instead of making statements and remaining open-minded when discussing sensitive topics like religion, money or politics.

8. Check if you and your partner discussed marriage?

If not, then why are you dating this person? If so, have you discussed the topic of marriage with family members and close friends? How did they respond to your idea of getting married? If they didn’t respond well, what did they say?

9. Check if both of you are financially stable?

Have both of you established careers or are both of you working hard towards career goals? If so, then how much money do both of your parents make combined? How much debt do they have?

Has either one or both of them been through a divorce or lost their job in the past few years? 

Is either one or both of them currently divorcing or getting a divorce from another spouse? What does that mean for your future together as a couple?

Does any of this affect how either one or both of them would treat each other in marriage?

Does either one or both of them have children from previous relationships who could affect either one or both?

10. Check if you can live with them for the rest of your life in any situation?

Also read: 10 Questions to ask yourself before breaking up or ending a relationship (Intuitive guide)

Getting ready for a date checklist


 It’s time to get ready for your date. The most important thing to do is relax. You want to be yourself and have fun, so don’t overthink it.

Here are Some getting ready for a date checklist and things you should do before a date:

1. Wear something comfortable but also flattering. If you feel good about yourself, you’ll be more confident, and that will show in how you carry yourself.

2. Check your appearance: Check your hair (do you need a trim?), check your teeth (are they clean?), and check your clothes (wear something that makes you feel confident).

3. Don’t wear too much makeup or any at all if you don’t normally wear it. You don’t want to look like a clown or like you’re trying too hard to impress someone.

4. Keep your hair styled nicely and clean-shaven if needed (or trimmed). You don’t want to look like you didn’t make an effort to look good for this date.

5. Make sure all of your accessories match each other — this includes shoes, jewelry, purses/handbags, watches, etc. If they don’t match completely, at least make sure they’re similar colors so you can complement each other.

6. Do some exercise and eat healthily beforehand so you feel better on your date!

7. Bring cash or a credit card: If possible, carry some cash in case the place doesn’t accept credit cards or the ATM is broken down (this happens sometimes).

8. Make sure your makeup is fresh and applied well; if you need help with this, go see a professional.

Don’t wear too much perfume or cologne, because sometimes it’s hard to smell when you’re nervous, and it might make the other person feel uncomfortable if they can’t smell their own perfume/cologne either.

And also don’t try anything new on the day of your date, because what if it doesn’t work out? It’s better to stick with what works for you than try something new and end up looking stupid or smelly or both.

9. Do any necessary grooming (waxing, tweezing, etc.).

10. If there’s something about your appearances that could be improved, such as a bad haircut or gray roots, take care of it now (get a haircut or color).

11. Check your breath to make sure it doesn’t smell like garlic or cigarettes (use mints or gum if necessary).

12. Make sure you’re on time: Don’t keep your date waiting around. If you’re running late, call or text and let them know what’s going on so they don’t worry about you being in an accident or something worse.

13. Be friendly and polite: Be friendly with waiters, bartenders, etc., because it will make them more likely to be nice if your date asks for their opinion of the place you’re going or if they have any suggestions for food/drinks there.

Plus, it’s just good manners! Don’t forget to say thank you when they bring the food/drink/check!

14. Be yourself! This should be obvious but sometimes people get nervous and forget who they really are when they’re trying to impress someone else.

So just remember: You are fabulous just as you are right now! If the other person doesn’t like that then they’re not worth knowing anyway.

Don’t change yourself just to fit in with someone else’s idea of what makes a good boyfriend/girlfriend.

Relationship needs checklist


 If you’re looking for a relationship, the first thing you’ll want to do is get clear about what kind of relationship you want.

The problem is that people often have a hard time knowing what they really want. They make decisions based on what they think is best for them, and then later realize that it wasn’t actually what they wanted at all.

To avoid this problem, here are some relationship needs checklist that will help you discover your true desires.

1. Check for someone who challenges you: Do you like being challenged by your partner? If so, this is something you should look for in a relationship.

The best way to know if your partner challenges you is to try talking about different political views or points of view with them.

If they seem open-minded and willing to engage in an intellectually stimulating conversation with you, then they’re probably challenging enough for your liking.

2. Check for someone who makes you feel safe: Do you want someone who will always be there for you when things go wrong? If so, safety should be one of your top priorities when it comes to finding love (and trust me — it’s important).

3. You need a partner who is your best friend

4. You need someone you can trust

5. You need someone who will listen to you

6. Check for a partner who respects you for who you are and not what they want you to be

7. You need a partner who will protect you from harm and danger, both physical and emotional

8. You need a partner who communicates with you in an open and honest way at all times

9. You need someone who treats you like a human being, not a superhero or as if they have to fix all of your problems so that they can feel better about themselves and their own lives

10. You need someone who makes time for you because they love spending time with you, not just because they have nothing else better to do with their time or because it’s something they feel like they should be doing (even if they don’t really want to)

Here are some more checklists you need for  a healthy relationship:

1. Time and attention

2. Honesty

3. Commitment

4. Security

5. Good communication

6. Respectful behavior and words

7. Attractive qualities about each other’s personality, appearance, etc. (physical and non-physical)

8. Shared values/interests/hobbies/passions/dreams/goals with each other (not just you)

9. Support for your goals and dreams (you have to support theirs too)

10. Dependability,

11. Sincerity,

12. Loyalty,

13. Empathy/compassion/kindness/concern/toleration

14. Humble and understanding

15. Life goals and aspirations are aligned

16. You need to trust each other completely, but also know when to give each other space (and when not to).

This also includes being able to fight fair and not bring up past issues that don’t matter anymore or talk about how you feel if you don’t want to do something with them, but they do (and vice versa)

17. You need to support each other’s goals and dreams in life, even if they aren’t the same as yours (and vice versa)

18. You need to respect each other’s privacy and boundaries – both physical and emotional – while also being able to communicate openly and freely with each other about anything on your mind or heart without fear of judgment or rejection from one another

19. You need to make time for one another as often as possible – even if it’s just an hour or two a week or once a month because quality time is always better than quantity time when it comes to relationships

 20. Maturity

21. Boundaries

22. Values

23. Integrity

24. Emotional availability & transparency

25. Communication skills (listening and speaking)

26. Family values/stability 

27. Financial responsibility (i.e., no excessive spending or frivolous spending habits, no debt) 

28: Sense of humor/ having fun

29: Ability to apologize and admit when wrong

30: Ability to compromise 

31: Commitment to the relationship rather than just commitment to one person 

32: Being able to give a compliment without making someone feel uncomfortable or embarrassed about it.

33: Not having unrealistic expectations of the other person (i.e., you don’t expect someone who was raised in a different culture or society to have your same values, beliefs, thoughts, etc.)

Healthy relationship checklist


A happy marriage is a relationship in which both partners are committed and want to grow together. It is not a perfect marriage, but it is a good one.

A healthy relationship can last a lifetime. But it takes work and commitment on both sides.

The following are some healthy relationship checklist will help you to be aware of your partner’s needs and expectations so that you can have a better understanding of the relationship between you both.

1. Are we having fun together?

2. Are we communicating openly with each other?

3. Do we take time out for ourselves?

4. Do we have similar values and interests?

5. Do we respect each other’s opinions/views/beliefs?

6. Are we looking forward to spending time with each other every day?

7. Are we able to forgive each other quickly when there is an argument or disagreement?

8. Do we know how important our partner feels loved and valued by us?

Follow these checklists to have a healthy relationship

Here are some healthy relationship checklist each couple must follow

 A healthy relationship is not just about love and romance. It’s about being with someone who can be a friend, lover, partner, and supporter.

A healthy relationship is all about mutual respect and trust. There are many things that can go wrong but if you follow these healthy relationship checklist every couple must have, then you will definitely avoid them.

1. Share Your Goals:

Sharing your goals is something that a lot of people don’t do because they think it will scare their partner away or make them feel pressured to meet their expectations.

This isn’t true at all! When you share your goals with your partner, they are more likely to support you along the way because they know what to expect from each other as well as when they are going through tough times together.

2. Keep Things Lighthearted:

When we get stressed out or frustrated by life’s challenges, it’s easy for our relationships to suffer too.

Since laughter releases endorphins that make us feel happier and more relaxed, keeping things light hearted is important for maintaining good vibes between two people who care about each other deeply.

A happy marriage isn’t always easy. But if you follow this list of healthy relationship habits, you’ll make it easier.

3. Have fun together.

4. Listen to each other.

5. Go on dates regularly (even if it’s just a walk around the block).

6. Support each other in pursuing your dreams and goals (even if they’re different from yours).

7. Be honest with each other about what’s going on in your lives — not just the good stuff, but also the bad stuff too (and don’t hold back from expressing how you feel about it).

8. Don’t keep score of who does more around the house or with the kids — do things together as a family rather than splitting responsibilities up between two people so that no one feels like they’re doing “more” than anyone else (or vice versa).

9. Don’t take each other for granted — say “thank you” often and appreciate each other’s presence in your life every day (not just when something goes wrong or when something good happens).

10. Don’t compare yourself to other couples — they may seem happier than you on social media because they choose to post only their best moments.

11. Be on the same page about money and finances.

12. Have a positive attitude towards s#x and intimacy.

13. Communicate your feelings openly and honestly with each other (without blaming).

14. Have realistic expectations about marriage and its responsibilities as well as its benefits.

15. Respect each other’s opinions, beliefs, values, and opinions while not compromising on your own values or beliefs in any way shape, or form.

16. Respect each other’s personal space without invading it unnecessarily or without permission from the other person!

17. Be open-minded about compromises when it comes to making decisions together as a couple.

Relationships Guide

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Naveen Bommakanti

Naveen is Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry.

Naveen’s expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few.

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