In Friends with benefits relationships, you feel a strong connection, but are not romantically or s#xually attracted to each other.
There are various pros and cons of friends with benefits.
You don’t think about marrying each other, and neither of you is looking for anything serious. Your friendship may date back a long time, perhaps since childhood or even longer.
Both people in your FWB relationship are available and have a history of involvement with others in their lives, be it parents, partners, children, or something else.
This can be confusing and frustrating when someone expects more from you than either of you wants. There are many pros and cons in friends with benefits relationship. In this article, let’s take a look at both sides.
At last, you can make an educated decision as to whether it will work for you or not.
If you’re going into a FWB situation already knowing what to expect, then chances are things will run smoothly from start to finish.
But if one person develops feelings that weren’t there before (and happens much more often than anyone would like), well then that complicates things quite a bit!
Related: Your complete guide to friends with benefits
Pros and cons of friends with benefits
Friends with benefits can have their fair share of pros and cons, just like any other type of relationship.
It’s important to keep in mind that both parties should always be on board for FWBs and shouldn’t feel any pressure from their partner. Here is the list of friends with benefits pros and cons:
15 Pros of friends with benefits
here are some of the pros of friends with benefits relationship:
1. It can be easier than a serious relationship:
Sometimes, FWBs can be far less complicated than real relationships. If you want casual s#x with no strings attached – then go ahead! If you don’t feel like it one day – then don’t do it.
No need to talk about how long we’ve been together or what we mean to each other.
2. You can enjoy some of your favorite things:
If you’re both single and looking for no strings attached to fun, then there’s nothing wrong with enjoying each other’s company in whatever ways you want.
If you both like each other enough and are interested in getting to know one another more intimately, then that’s great too – but don’t make any promises you aren’t sure you can keep.
3. You get a unique experience:
Although FWBs are similar to one-night stands, they’re still different in their own ways. And it doesn’t hurt that every once in a while, you might find someone who is truly worth keeping around – at least as a friend.
4. You get to spend some time away from your serious partner:
If you’re already in a relationship, then it’s okay for you and your partner to engage in FWBs too.
Your partner doesn’t have to know if you don’t want them to – although if they find out, be prepared for some awkwardness.
That being said, it can be hard balancing both relationships, so make sure that each party is on board before embarking on your FWB escapades.
Just like anything else, FWBs are far better when everyone involved is happy and comfortable with what’s going on. If that isn’t the case – well then we’d say it’s time for everyone involved to move on.
Also read: Types of friends with benefits
5. You don’t have to be in a relationship to do it:
Although some people think that FWBs are only for single individuals, that’s actually not true.
If you’re already in a committed monogamous relationship and would like to add some spice to your life, then you’re more than welcome.
It might even help rekindle your romance if you’ve been feeling bored or monotonous lately.
6. It can be a great way to test a person out:
In some cases, FWBs are simply practicing rounds for people who are still trying to find someone they want to settle down with.
Some people will tell you that once you find the one – everything else seems dull and boring by comparison.
Although it may not be love at first sight – if you feel strongly enough about each other, then there’s always a chance that your FWB might blossom into something serious.
That being said, it’s important not to get too attached right off the bat because as we know, relationships don’t last forever… no matter how much we’d like them to.
7. It can be a great learning experience:
FWBs are a great way for single people to practice being in relationships. If you’re new at dating or haven’t dated for a while, then you might want to try FWBs out before jumping back into it wholeheartedly.
It’s also a great opportunity for couples who are trying to work on their communication skills or learn more about what their partner likes and dislikes.
That being said, remember that sometimes – things don’t always work out as expected, and if one person gets hurt, then it’s best to part ways amicably so everyone involved can move on.
8. You can use it as a gateway into other relationships:
FWBs can also be a way for single people to start meeting other like-minded individuals and potentially start dating them too.
Once you’ve gotten comfortable, talking about your FWB experiences is a great way for both parties to get to know each other better – if they want to. There’s nothing wrong with expanding your dating horizons.
So long as everyone involved is happy and aware of what’s going on, then there should be no problem.
In fact, FWBs are a great opportunity for couples who are looking at introducing some kink or roleplay into their lives as well.
9. It can be a great confidence booster:
FWBs are a great way for single people who aren’t looking for anything serious but would like to get more involved in dating.
They allow you to experiment and test new things that might not be possible in a real monogamous relationship – while still enjoying all of their perks.
If you’re feeling insecure about your appearance, social awkwardness, or just not sure what it is that you’re looking for, then FWBs are a great way for you to gain some self-confidence before going out there again.
Once you learn what works and what doesn’t, then chances are good that you’ll feel better about yourself and your abilities as well. This can lead up to much more positive long-term results.
Also read: 9 Stages of friends with benefits
10. It can be a great way to relieve some stress:
FWBs are great if you’re looking for a way to vent and blow off some steam.
After all, it doesn’t always have to be about s#x, although that is one of its main perks; sometimes, just hanging out and chatting about random stuff with no expectations attached can do wonders for your mental health as well.
It’s important not to take everything too seriously – if you don’t feel comfortable doing something in bed, then don’t do it.
Make sure that what both of you are getting out of it is worth it – because there’s nothing worse than feeling miserable in a relationship when you could be enjoying your life.
11. It can be a great stress reliever:
Let’s face it – sometimes, everyone needs a good, steamy romp in bed. If you’re feeling stressed out or just in need of some s#xual satisfaction, then there’s nothing wrong with taking matters into your own hands.
In fact, FWBs are a great way for couples who have been together for an extended period of time to spice things up and keep their intimate life fresh and exciting.
So long as both parties are consensual about it – and know that it is completely casual, then there’s no reason why you shouldn’t give FWBs a try. There’s nothing like testing new waters every once in a while; especially if it involves s#x.
12. It can be a great way to explore your s#xual fantasies:
Everyone has s#xual fantasies that they might want to try out some time – but perhaps not with their partner.
FWBs are a great way for you and your partner to experiment, while still keeping things safe and exciting.
After all, it’s one thing when you’re trying something new together in bed – but it’s an entirely different situation when it comes time for one of you to satisfy your own personal needs alone.
When used correctly, FWBs can make couples stronger than ever before! They might even lead up to deeper intimacy and better s#x; who knows? You’ll never know unless you try.
Also read: 75 Questions for friends with benefits
13. It can open up a new world of opportunities:
If you’ve ever wanted to experiment, but are too nervous about being judged for it, then FWBs might be right up your alley.
FWBs are a great way for you and your partner to try something new and exciting, while not having any pressure attached.
It’s all in good fun, after all – so there’s no reason why you shouldn’t enjoy yourself! Who knows?
Maybe experimenting through s#x will lead up to further intimacy in other aspects of your life as well – who knows what kinds of benefits or skills can come from trying something totally new? So go ahead and give it a shot.
There’s nothing wrong with venturing into something completely different every once in a while; especially if it means having fun doing it.
14. It can make you and your partner closer:
FWBs are a great way for couples to get closer together – provided they’re both on board, of course.
Through s#xual intimacy, you and your partner will feel more connected than ever before – especially if s#x is already a big part of your relationship.
The more physical connection that you share, in every sense of the word, will help strengthen your emotional connection as well. And once it’s all said and done, you’ll be left feeling even more connected than before.
So what are you waiting for? Start thinking about giving FWBs a try today. You never know what kinds of naughty fun might be right around the corner.
15. It can help you learn more about your partner:
FWBs are a great way for you and your partner to learn more about each other. While s#x is all fun and games, it’s important that you still respect each other’s boundaries.
So even if one of you is feeling up for something new, it doesn’t mean that both of you are on board for it – so make sure to talk things through.
You might be surprised at how many things turn out differently than expected – especially if feelings start getting involved.
It’s important that everyone gets what they want out of a situation like this, while still making sure everyone is having a good time in bed. Communication between partners is essential, even in casual relationships.
Also read: 50+ Questions to ask your fwb
15 cons of friends with benefits:
Here are some of the cons of friends with benefits:
1. You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into:
You can have all of these reasons – and more – for jumping into a FWBs arrangement, but at the end of the day, there’s one major issue that will always be in play: you have no idea what you’re really getting yourself into.
Everyone comes from different worlds, and has different desires and expectations – so even if you can respect your partner’s wishes, it doesn’t mean that they’ll do right by you too.
It’s important to remember that FWBs come with a certain level of emotional baggage as well; so make sure you’re ready for any potential curveballs.
2. There’s still a level of commitment involved:
While FWBs are definitely a more casual arrangement, they’re still an arrangement nonetheless.
Even if you and your partner want to make sure that you’re on a level playing field – it doesn’t mean that things will remain as casual as you both want them to.
There’s always room for feelings; so don’t be surprised if those pesky emotions start getting in the way.
If one or both partners have strong feelings for one another, it’ll change their entire perspective on things.
It might seem cute at first, but really, it could lead to disaster. Things can get very messy in no time flat – so make sure you’re both prepared for any curveballs or obstacles that could come along.
3. You have to be 100% honest and open:
Even if you’re both feeling up for something casual, it doesn’t mean that there are no feelings involved whatsoever.
In fact, we all know that things could go horribly wrong if one or both partners aren’t totally honest about their feelings.
If someone has a serious change of heart, it can really put a damper on things – especially if you’ve been together for a while.
4. You might get STD:
While a lot of people think that FWBs are less risky than more serious relationships, they’re definitely not risk-free. Unless you both have had all of your tests done and have discussed birth control options.
You could be putting yourself at risk for STDs like HIV, herpes, or even something called super gonorrhea.
So even if you’ve been tested before, it’s still important to remind each other that safe s#x is always necessary.
It doesn’t matter if one or both partners want to remain free from any serious feelings – there’s still a chance that one or both partners could fall victim; so it’s always better safe than sorry.
5. You have no idea where you stand:
There’s always room for uncertainty in relationships – even more so when they’re casual. While it’s a good thing to be upfront and honest about your feelings, that doesn’t mean that there aren’t any slip-ups along the way.
FWBs can be tricky; you never know if one or both partners are feeling something more than friendship.
If there are feelings involved, it’ll change everything – especially if one or both partners feel like they’re being cheated on.
Talk things through before getting into any FWBs relationships – even if you’ve been together for a while – and make sure everyone is on board with your arrangement; otherwise, things can get messy very quickly.
Also read: 150+ Friends with benefits questions to ask
6. You have no idea how long it’ll last:
It’s always best to be prepared for any surprises, so make sure you know where your FWB situation is headed.
If you both want it to remain casual, then it’s best that you both don’t put too much stock into each other.
If one or both partners are feeling something more than friendship, they might start wanting more out of their FWBs relationship.
And if that’s not what you’re willing or ready for, things can get tricky quickly Plus, when things do go south, a lot of people like to throw around crazy accusations that just aren’t true.
So before jumping into anything, make sure everyone has a full understanding of where they stand and what they want out of their arrangement.
7. It’s easy to get emotionally attached:
We all know that no matter how great a relationship starts off, there are always chances of things getting messy.
While FWBs can make it a lot easier for both parties if feelings aren’t involved, it doesn’t mean that those pesky emotions won’t find their way in.
If one or both partners do end up falling for each other, it might seem easy to stick around and try to fight for them – but at what cost?
It’s so easy to get attached even when you don’t want too – especially since FWBs can be more frequent than you think.
So before jumping into anything, make sure everyone is on board and honest about what they’re looking for.
8. You have to be okay with certain quirks:
Just like in any other relationship, FWBs come with their own set of quirks. In fact, most people who are in FWBs relationships say that it can sometimes feel like you’re part of a couple – except without all of those messy feelings.
And even though you’re both okay with it being only physical, that doesn’t mean that things will always go smoothly.
It’s still important to be open and honest about your thoughts and feelings; otherwise, things can get awkward quickly.
Also read: What does FWB mean?
9. You have no control over how they feel:
Since FWBs relationships are generally kept under wraps, it can be pretty difficult when one or both partners start to feel differently.
If one or both partners do end up changing their minds, it’s easy for them to say that you’re cheating on them – even if you haven’t done anything wrong.
So before entering into any FWBs relationships, make sure everyone is okay with keeping things secret from their loved ones. If not, then it might be time to find a new arrangement!
10. You have no control over how they treat you:
Even though FWBs relationships don’t involve any long-term commitments, it doesn’t mean that partners aren’t going to get attached.
If things go sour, it can be hard for them to let go of their feelings for you – and things can quickly get messy.
So before jumping into anything, make sure everyone is okay with a casual – not serious – arrangement.
If one or both partners are looking for something more, then maybe it’s time to move on and find someone new.
11. It can feel like you’re cheating:
It’s no secret that FWBs’ relationships can be hard to explain if either partner is dating someone else – and it doesn’t help when they don’t know what you do on your off time.
And while it might not seem like cheating, things can still get complicated if one or both partners feel differently. Plus, let’s face it: most of us have that one friend who’s always looking for any reason to point out another person’s flaws.
And if they ever find out that you’re in a FWBs situation, they might not hesitate to make fun of you behind your back. Just make sure you’re ready for all of those possible scenarios before jumping into anything.
12. You have to remember that it’s only physical:
While some FWBs relationships do involve s#x, not all of them do – so before diving in headfirst, make sure everyone is on board.
If you’re looking for a one-night stand or an ongoing FWB situation, then maybe it’s best just to keep things casual and fun.
But if you’re looking for something more, then maybe you should consider rethinking your options.
Either way, make sure everyone is on board with whatever terms you decide on before settling into anything serious.
You may want someone to call your own, but if they aren’t open about a future, then it might be time to find someone new.
13. You have to let go of your feelings:
Just like any other relationships, FWBs also come with their own set of feelings – both good and bad. But just because it’s casual doesn’t mean that you can keep your guard down.
You still have to make sure that your emotions don’t get in the way of everything! You might be physically involved with one another, but if you’re still pining for them, then it might be time to reconsider.
No matter how much we love someone, no matter how much chemistry we have – sometimes things just aren’t meant to be.
So before getting too emotionally invested, think about whether or not they are open to a real relationship! If not, then maybe it’s time for something new.
14. You may get jealous because of multiple FWB:
Just like in any other relationship, jealousy is an issue that you will have to deal with – whether you want it or not.
But just because it’s casual doesn’t mean you can’t use your best judgment. While you’re trying your best not to fall for them, they might be doing their best not to fall for you.
To avoid any problems, make sure everyone is okay with no feelings attached. If anyone has feelings for each other, then maybe it’s time for a real relationship.
It might be fun to flirt and fool around, but if either party gets hurt by their actions, then everyone will lose out in the end.
So before entering into anything serious, make sure both parties are open about how they feel.
15. FWB can affect your future relationships:
If you’re looking for a long-term commitment, FWBs are definitely not for you.
No matter how much chemistry you have or how compatible you think you are, there’s no way of knowing whether or not it will work out – especially if they don’t see things in a similar way.
Plus, if they’re not ready for any type of commitment, then maybe it’s time to move on.
You might find someone who’s right for now, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be right for later down the road.
If either party is already seeing someone else, then maybe you should consider dropping them altogether.
Also read: What are friends with benefits?
