How to be friends with someone you love? (17 Tips)

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By: Naveen B

Usually when two people are attracted to each other, they naturally want to become more than just friends.

This means that your friendship is at risk of ending if your mutual attraction causes you to be more than just friends. Although falling in love can be exciting and fun, it can also cause confusion and conflict in your life.

If falling in love causes problems in your relationship, you might decide that it’s best not to get involved with your friend; however, if you choose not get involved with your friend because of possible problems or risks then consider staying friends while trying to distance yourself from him or her at least emotionally. 

Recommended reading: How to stop loving someone but stay friends?

You may still think about him or her physically but hopefully time will heal any emotional wounds left behind by trying to remain strictly friends.

Sometimes, people develop feelings for their good friends, which can make it hard to act like friends. If you’re concerned that your friend has or will develop romantic or s#xual interest in you, it’s important not to sabotage your friendship. Here is the complete guide to maintain a healthy relationship.

How to be friends with someone you love?

how to be friends with someone you love How to be friends with someone you love? (17 Tips)

How to be friends with someone you love? Trust your gut feeling when trying to be friends with someone you love. Enjoying each other’s company, developing a genuine friendship and growing as individuals through shared experiences with others can be meaningful and fulfilling even if you don’t form romantic attachments.

Romantic relationships can certainly enhance those aspects of your life, but there’s nothing wrong with establishing and nurturing them independently.

On an even more pragmatic level, friendships can survive differences in opinion and help you cope with everyday problems more effectively—as well as giving you someone to lean on when times get tough.

At their best, they increase our knowledge of ourselves and prepare us for healthy relationships in the future by taking into account what we need from others.

Also read: Can you stop loving someone you truly loved?

Ask yourself if you’re actually friends: If your feelings for your friend developed over time, it may be hard to pinpoint when exactly your feelings developed. But even if you don’t remember noticing anything different about your friend or his or her behavior, it’s important to ask yourself if you really think of each other as friends.

Having good communication skills can help in figuring out these types of things—and it can prevent any potential awkwardness in conversations. Think about what type of person you find interesting and attractive in general and compare that with your friend. 

You may realize that there is little in common between you outside of friendship, which might make it easier to accept that they aren’t right for you. Remember, it’s normal to experience feelings of love for your friends. However, if you have romantic or s#xual feelings for your friend, you need to try to suppress them.

17 Tips to be friends with someone you love.

tips to be friends with someone you love How to be friends with someone you love? (17 Tips)

Here are some tips on how to maintain a friendly relationship when one person has romantic or s#xual interest in another. 

#1 Don’t betray their trust:

If your friend confides in you about developing romantic or s#xual attraction, respect them by keeping it private. Never gossip about your friend behind their back with anyone else. Doing so will create distrust and can lead to damaging relationships between others, not just yourself and your friend. 

#2 Remain honest:

In a platonic relationship, both parties can occasionally get confused about where exactly they stand. In order to retain a solid friendship, be up front and clear about how you feel from time to time.

Once you come clean with how you really feel, don’t waver from that position—even if your emotions seem unclear at times.

Being honest will help keep your friendship strong while avoiding hurt feelings that could destroy an otherwise strong bond between two people who truly care for each other.

#3 Don’t pressure them into anything they don’t want:

Some well-meaning people might try to push their friend into pursuing something more than friendship because they think it would make them happy. While it may sound nice in theory, doing so is never OK unless specifically requested by your friend.

If you try forcing yourself on someone out of romantic or s#xual interest alone, it could very well do irreparable damage to whatever relationship exists between you now or whatever could develop in the future. 

#4 Stay respectful of boundaries:

Just because one person doesn’t share your romantic or s#xual attraction doesn’t mean he or she has no feelings whatsoever for you as a person.

If your friend isn’t interested in anything beyond friendship, respect that and understand that there may be nothing wrong with them—they simply don’t see you in any other way than what exists between two good friends. If they ask, listen and don’t push them on things they’re not ready for. 

#5 Understand their point of view:

If it helps, remember that there are two sides to every story—and most often they probably aren’t thinking about how their actions impact you in any negative way at all. Don’t assume everyone is romantically interested in you just because you are attracted to them.

They may simply be nice people who want nothing more than to remain friendly acquaintances. Think from your friend’s perspective and try imagining what he or she must think of your behavior as well as his or her own. You might realize how your friend sees things a little differently from what you initially thought.

#6 Remember you’ll always care about each other:

Although a romantic relationship between you and a good friend might not work out, try not to let it turn either of you off from maintaining a good friendship after some time has passed.

Even if one person feels betrayed by something another person did during their romantic interest phase, remember that forgiveness is important for any good friendship. 

#7 Make things right when necessary:

If your friend felt your actions were hurtful at all, make an effort to make things right when possible. For instance, admit you made a mistake in sharing too much information or misinterpreted their comments in an earlier conversation.

By being honest about how you feel—whether good or bad—your friend will likely open up more when talking with you next time instead of closing himself or herself off.

By accepting responsibility for your actions and admitting fault where needed, trust can easily be restored between two people who may still be interested in having a strong platonic bond.

#8 Just enjoy each other’s company as before:

As long as there’s mutual respect, honesty and consideration for each other’s personal boundaries, you shouldn’t stop hanging out or talking with them just because a once-romantic attraction didn’t develop into anything further.

Take a step back to see what needs adjusting on both sides before deciding whether it would be best to continue down a friendly path together or part ways as acquaintances moving forward.

However, don’t force yourself on them emotionally; no one wants to continue interacting with someone he or she doesn’t want anything more than friendship from. 

#9 Keep an emotional distance from them:

If possible, let them interact with other men/women when you’re not present. Do things separately sometimes and suggest doing things alone more often than before.

#10 Start letting go of your attachment:

Stop seeing them as the one and start letting go of hope. The truth is that while it may be normal to hope for reconciliation or acceptance once we lose something we love, it isn’t healthy or productive in many cases. Letting go is difficult but it’s necessary if we want peace of mind and greater happiness in our lives moving forward.

#11 Don’t hold on to hope:

Don’t overanalyze texts and/or wait by your phone hoping he/she will send you some sort of message. Be as upbeat as you can, continue enjoying life and find better ways to fill your time. Move on with living happily.

#12 Find better role models:

You might feel disappointed that he/she doesn’t see anything special in you but consider all those qualities around you – whatever they are – and try fitting them into what they value most within others whom they interact with on a daily basis (friends/coworkers).

Once again, live out loud – do good things for people around you! You’ll soon discover positive attention coming back at very unexpected times from places where you never expected them to come from.

#13 Develop great friendships outside of them:

It makes perfect sense to develop strong friendships because friends are vital to overall well-being during stressful situations such as breakups! Some studies even show that friendship could act as an important protective factor against poor psychological adjustment after breakups.

#14 Think less about starting new relationships until you’ve put yourself through extensive self-reflection: 

Most importantly, know that it’s entirely natural to feel hurt after loss; recognize that these emotions won’t last forever.

Think deeply about why you were unable to succeed romantically given who you are; don’t settle for mediocrity simply because she wasn’t right for me. Instead realize any person worth loving will fall hard knowing he has his work cut out for him in order to prove his worthiness. 

After self-reflection ask yourself whether your past relationship was somehow holding you back; if so then don’t waste another minute thinking of her.

#15 Consider getting your heart broken as a step towards improving your life:

Losing a relationship and feeling pain is never easy; but it helps to remember that we must experience pain and sorrow if we ever hope to achieve contentment and genuine joy.

When things go wrong – take responsibility for what you need to fix in yourself; ask yourself what bad habits or thought patterns got you into your current situation.

Work on not repeating those mistakes again. Remember, losing someone does not mean it’s too late to improve upon your own behavior – just look at how easily you fell for her!

#16 Stay hopeful that better things are just around the corner:

Give it time. Eventually, you will learn to accept that she didn’t share your feelings and be able to move on with building a more fulfilling life for yourself. You deserve someone who treats you with respect, trust and confidence – but don’t give up hope.

There are still plenty of happy relationships out there if you’re willing to learn from your past experiences instead of regretting them.

#17 Become more self-aware:

 Develop self awareness by identifying at least three things that are working well in your life currently: Don’t forget to look for ways in which you’re already successful at loving yourself.

Recommended reading:

How long does it take to get over someone you love?

How to say goodbye to someone you love?

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Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry. His expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few. To be updated with his latest work, connect with him by following his social media accounts.

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