Long term friends with benefits guide and 20+ tips to maintain it in a healthy way

By: Naveen B

Friends with benefits, the ambiguous grey area between a committed relationship and a casual hookup, has been a topic of fascination for many.

It’s a concept that has been glorified in popular culture, but often dismissed as unsustainable in real life.

However, what if I told you that a long-term friends with benefits relationship is not only possible but can also be a fulfilling and healthy arrangement?

That’s right, you can have your cake and eat it too, but only if you know how to navigate this complicated terrain.

In this guide, I’ll explore the intricate nuances of maintaining a long-term friends with benefits relationship, and answer some of the most pressing questions around it. Can it evolve into a relationship? How long does it typically last? And most importantly, how can you keep it healthy and satisfying for both parties involved?

So buckle up and get ready for a deep dive into the world of long-term friends with benefits relationships – I promise you won’t regret it. (If you have any questions that were not addressed in this post, you can leave them in the comments section and I will make sure to respond to you as soon as possible.)

Your guide to long term friends with benefits relationship

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Can friends with benefits be long-term?

Friends with benefits relationships can be long-term if both parties are emotionally mature and willing to work through any potential issues that may arise.

It is important to remember that this type of relationship does not include the same expectations of commitment and intimacy as a traditional romantic relationship.

In order for a FWB relationship to be successful, both parties must be comfortable with the arrangement and be honest about their intentions.

One of the most important aspects of having a successful long-term FWB relationship is the ability to manage emotions.

As with any relationship, feelings can change over time, and being able to discuss these changes openly and honestly is essential.

Both you and your long term fwb partner should be open to discussing any feelings that arise and be willing to listen to the other person’s perspective.

Being able to discuss feelings without judgment can help the relationship remain healthy and successful.

Another important factor to consider is communication. Communication is essential to any relationship, and this is especially true of a FWB relationship.

You both should be willing to talk openly and honestly about your needs, expectations, and any concerns they may have. It is important to be able to discuss any changes in the relationship and be able to reach a compromise.

It is also crucial  to maintain boundaries in a long term Friends with benefits relationship. This includes being clear about physical boundaries, such as when and where physical contact is appropriate, as well as emotional boundaries, such as what topics are off-limits.

Respect for each other’s boundaries is essential to maintaining a healthy relationship.

Finally, it is important to have realistic expectations. Friends with benefits relationships can be beneficial, but they should not be viewed as a replacement for a committed relationship.

Both of you should be clear about what they want from the relationship, and be willing to reassess the arrangement if either person’s needs change. 

In conclusion, friends with benefits relationships can be long-term if both of you are willing to work through any potential issues that may arise. It is important to be honest and open about intentions, manage emotions, communicate effectively, maintain boundaries, and have realistic expectations.

By following these guidelines, a FWB relationship can be successful and beneficial to both parties.

Also read: 100 Things to do with friends with benefits, hookups or no strings attached relationships

Can long-term FWB turn into a relationship?

It is certainly possible for a friends with benefits (FWB) relationship to turn into a romantic one, but it’s not always a straightforward process. From my experience, I have seen that there are a number of factors to consider in order for this to happen.

At its core, a FWB relationship is based on two people enjoying each other’s company and engaging in sexual activity without any long-term commitment or expectations.

In this type of relationship, both parties are free to come and go as they please and can maintain an emotional distance from each other.

This is in contrast to a romantic relationship which is typically based on mutual trust, respect, and strong emotional connection.

For a FWB relationship to turn into a romantic one, it is essential to re-evaluate the goals of the relationship and decide if there is a mutual desire to move forward towards a more committed relationship.

This should be done with an open mind, considering the motivations and feelings of both partners.

In fact, in a Longitudinal study about friends with benefits 15% turned into a relationship. As per a survey of match.com’s singles in america 45% FWB relationships turned into a committed relationship.

It’s important to recognize that if both partners are not equally interested in transitioning to a romantic relationship, then it is likely that one of the parties will be disappointed and the relationship may suffer as a result.

In addition, it is important to consider the timing of the transition. If either partner feels that the transition is happening too quickly, it can create tension and discomfort in the relationship. 

You both should take the necessary time to build trust and develop a strong emotional connection before making any big decisions.

Finally, it is important to maintain a healthy balance between physical and emotional intimacy. 

While physical intimacy can be enjoyable in a FWB relationship, it is important to remember that without an emotional connection, a romantic relationship is unlikely to be successful in the long run.

Therefore, it is important to take the time to get to know each other on a deeper level and create a strong emotional bond.

In summary, it is possible for a FWB relationship to turn into a romantic one, but it requires a great deal of communication, consideration, and commitment from both partners.

It is important to recognize that a romantic relationship requires a stronger emotional connection and commitment than a FWB relationship and that both parties need to be on the same page in order for this transition to be successful.

Also read: How to make your friend with benefits fall for you and catch feelings?

How to maintain a long-term friends with benefits relationship and keep it healthy?

Maintaining a long-term friends with benefits (FWB) relationship can be challenging, but with some effort, it can also be incredibly rewarding. To keep the relationship healthy and lasting, it is important to understand the unique dynamics of FWB relationships and be aware of the different components that make them successful. 

First and foremost, it is important to recognize that FWB relationships involve more than just physical intimacy. It is essential to understand and appreciate the friendship aspect of the relationship.

This means that in addition to physical affection, it is important to create a safe space for communication and emotional connection.

This can be done by being open and honest about expectations, feelings, and boundaries. It is also important to remember that FWB relationships are not exclusive or romantic, so it is important to recognize that it is okay to see other people and maintain other friendships. 

Another important aspect of FWB relationships is to ensure that both parties remain committed to their relationship.

Even though there is no commitment to a romantic or exclusive relationship, it is important to be aware of the other person’s feelings and to respect their wishes.

This means that if one person wishes to end the relationship, it should be done in a respectful and understanding way.

Also read: Friends with benefits vs relationship, difference between dating and open relationship or fwb

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10 Tips to maintain a long-term friends with benefits relationship successfully

Here are some useful tips to maintain your long term fwb relationship:

1. Set clear and specific boundaries: As the relationship progresses, it’s important to establish clear and specific boundaries to ensure that both parties are on the same page. This can include things like frequency of contact, level of emotional involvement, and exclusivity.

2. Be respectful of each other’s time: As the relationship becomes more established, it’s important to be respectful of each other’s time and priorities outside of the relationship.

3. Keep communication lines open: Regular and open communication is key to maintaining a long-term FWB relationship. Make time to check in with each other regularly and discuss any concerns or changes in feelings.

4. Be mindful of each other’s feelings: While the relationship is casual, it’s important to be mindful of each other’s feelings and avoid behavior that could be hurtful or insensitive.

5. Discuss long-term expectations: As the relationship continues, it’s important to discuss long-term expectations to ensure that both parties are on the same page. This could include things like how long the relationship will continue or what happens if one person meets someone else.

Also read: Is friends with benefits a relationship? How it is different and which is better?

6. Don’t make assumptions: Don’t assume that just because the relationship has been going on for a long time that it will continue indefinitely. Regularly check in with each other and reassess the relationship as needed.

7. Be supportive: While the relationship is casual, it’s important to be supportive of each other and celebrate each other’s successes.

8. Practice safe sex: As the relationship becomes more established, it’s important to practice safe sex to ensure both parties remain healthy and protected.

9. Be honest about changes in feelings: As with any relationship, feelings can change over time. If one person begins to develop romantic feelings, it’s important to be honest and communicate openly with each other.

10. Keep things exciting: Just because the relationship is casual, it doesn’t mean it has to be boring. Keep things exciting and try new things together to keep the relationship fresh and interesting.

Also read: 50 FWB Texting Rules (with examples, tips, questions to ask while setting texting rules)

11. Avoid jealousy: Jealousy can be a major issue in FWB relationships, particularly as the relationship becomes more established. Be mindful of each other’s feelings and avoid behavior that could trigger jealousy.

12. Be upfront about other partners: As the relationship continues, it’s important to be upfront and honest about other partners to avoid misunderstandings or hurt feelings.

13. Take breaks if needed: Just like any other relationship, taking breaks can be necessary to ensure that both parties are happy and fulfilled.

14. Don’t let the relationship interfere with other priorities: As the relationship becomes more established, it’s important to make sure that other priorities such as work or family are not neglected.

15. Be reliable: If you make plans with your partner, stick to them. Don’t flake out or cancel at the last minute.

16. Be mindful of your actions: Don’t do anything that could jeopardize your friendship or your FWB relationship.

Also read: 50 Psychological effects of friends with benefits

17. Don’t get too attached: FWB relationships are designed to be casual, so don’t get too emotionally invested.

18. Keep it private: Keep your relationship private, and don’t share intimate details with others.

19. Keep the romance out of it: Don’t try to make your FWB relationship into something more than it is.

20. Keep things light: FWB relationships work best when there is no pressure or expectations. Keep things light and fun, and don’t let things get too serious.

21. Reassess regularly: Regularly reassess the relationship to ensure that both parties are happy and fulfilled. Be willing to make changes or end the relationship if needed.

22. Know when to call it quits: If your FWB relationship is no longer working for you, it’s okay to end it. Be honest with yourself and your partner, and move on with kindness and respect.

23. Don’t be afraid to turn it into a committed relationship: If both parties develop feelings and want to turn the FWB relationship into a committed relationship, it’s important to communicate openly and honestly with each other about this desire.

While it’s possible for a FWB relationship to turn into a committed relationship, it’s not always the case and both parties should be prepared for any outcome.

Also read: Can friends with benefits fall in love? Research says “Yes.” 

How long does the average friends with benefits last? 

The length of a friends with benefits relationship varies greatly depending on the individuals involved and their motivations.

It is important to note that this type of relationship is not a long-term commitment and is typically short-term in nature.

Generally, Friends with benefits relationships last anywhere from a few months to a few years. 

However, it is important to note that the longevity of the relationship depends on the level of trust, respect, understanding between the two parties and their decision of how long they want to keep it going.

Can friends with benefits last for years? Research suggests that contrary to popular belief, it is possible to remain in a friends with benefits (FWB) relationship. On average, only 14% of FWB relationships lasted past four months. 32% of these relationships occurred between four and six months, 24% between six and eight months, 17% between eight and ten months, 7% for ten to twelve months, and 6% for twelve to twenty-four months.

At the outset, it is important to understand that a friends with benefits relationship is one that involves physical intimacy without commitment or expectations of a future together.

As such, the duration of the relationship is typically determined by the individuals involved and the level of comfort they have with the arrangement.

For example, some individuals may find that a few months is enough time to explore the relationship and move on, while others may feel the need for a longer-term arrangement.

In addition to the individuals’ motivations and comfort level, there are other factors that can contribute to the length of a friends with benefits relationship.

For instance, the amount of physical contact and the intensity of the relationship can impact the length of the arrangement. Additionally, external pressures such as work, family, or other commitments can influence the duration.

Also read: How long can a friends with benefits relationship last?

How long should friends with benefits last?

Friends with benefits relationships can last as long as both parties are comfortable, as they are not limited by the parameters of traditional romantic relationships.

It is important to note, however, that there are certain considerations to be taken into account when maintaining an FWB relationship. These considerations are often overlooked by both fwb partners, but understanding them can ultimately be beneficial.

First, it is essential to remember that FWB relationships are not a substitute for traditional romantic relationships.

While they can be enjoyable and fulfilling in their own way, it is important to recognize that they are not always going to provide the same level of connection as a committed partnership.

As such, it is important to recognize when the relationship has reached its end, or if you are looking for something more.

Second, you both should be aware of the different dynamics within an FWB relationship. While it may be assumed that both parties are on equal footing, this is not always the case.

In some cases, one person may feel more emotionally invested than the other, leading to imbalances that can be difficult to manage.

Finally, it is important to recognize that even in an FWB relationship, communication is key. While there may be an understanding that the relationship is casual, it is still crucial to discuss any new developments in the relationship, any feelings that may have changed, or any disagreements that may arise.

Establishing effective communication can help to ensure that both parties are on the same page and that the relationship can last.

In conclusion, there is no set timeline for how long an FWB relationship should last. However, it is important to understand the different considerations that should be taken into account in order to ensure that the relationship is healthy and fulfilling for both parties.

With open communication and mutual understanding, FWB relationships can be an enjoyable and rewarding experience for all involved.

Also read: How long can you be friends with benefits with someone?

Final thoughts:

In conclusion, a long-term friends with benefits relationship can be a viable option for those who are seeking a casual, yet intimate arrangement.

While it requires open communication, mutual respect, and clear boundaries, it can also offer a level of emotional connection and physical satisfaction that is hard to find in other types of relationships.

Whether it evolves into something more or remains in its original form, a long-term friends with benefits relationship can be a positive experience if both parties approach it with honesty and a willingness to make it work.

With the tips, insights, and facts provided in this guide, you can confidently navigate this complex terrain and enjoy the benefits of a long-term friends with benefits relationship.

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Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry. His expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few. To be updated with his latest work, connect with him by following his social media accounts.

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