How to get someone to like you over text? (10 Tips)

By: Naveen B

We live in a digital world where we can connect with anyone, anywhere, at any time—which is great. In fact, when done well, it can be a very effective way of getting to know each other. 

Texting is more immediate than in-person communication and allows for spontaneous one-on-one time.

But that also means if you want to know how to get someone to like you over text, you need to make sure your texts are personal and meaningful enough for that person to continue wanting more.

When it comes to getting a date, there are few things more nerve-wracking than asking someone out over text. Will they say yes? Will they think your message is weird? You might feel sick with worry that you’re coming across too strong or not strong enough.

Sending an unsolicited text can often come off as creepy or even desperate, but when done right, it can be the perfect way to catch someone’s attention.

As long as you avoid the most common mistakes, sending the right text can make you seem caring and confident instead of desperate and pathetic.

So how to ask someone if they like you over text? And how do you craft the perfect text that will have your crush begging to hang out with you?

Don’t worry! Asking someone out via text is an art and there are many ways for you to improve in order to impress him or her. Follow this practical guide and apply them where it is necessary.

Recommended reading: How to get someone to like you? (complete guide)

How to get someone to like you over text?


In regards to texting, the psychological behavior of men and women is different, because women want to exchange as much information about their feelings as possible. They use these conversations for self-expression, so they try to make it as emotional and interesting as possible.

Men are different in that regard: they don’t care so much about talking emotions over text unless they have a sensitive personality. If a man does not talk about feelings very often, it does not mean he has a cold heart or something like that.

But rather he just does not feel any need to tell everything about his feelings via text messages, especially if there is nothing special going on between him and the woman with whom he talks.

So, how to get someone to like you over text? Every person is unique. If you want to make someone fall in love with you over text, you better understand their personality type and behave accordingly through your choice words in text messages.

You can share your stories, describe what happened today/yesterday/during weekend etc. This will give them an opportunity to learn more about you. This is also quite good chance to show off – be careful with exaggeration though, never lie.

Try to reveal something new and intriguing without coming across as aggressive or unfriendly. For example say I’m going surfing tomorrow, do you know where I can rent a board? Or ask Are you having lunch today?. When writing texts remember all people respond differently.

So sometimes a shy guy will reply more than a hot-blooded girl. Some people find typing easier than speaking etc. It really depends on the particular situation and the person involved in it.

But overall you shouldn’t forget, Some guys hate long complicated texts as much as girls hate phone calls during which guys don’t listen to what they say.

Also read: How to get someone to like you romantically and make them fall in love with you?

Your role should be to keep them interested and entertained by keeping things simple, relaxed and fun. And most importantly, stay away from negative comments or jokes about certain topics (family relations, exes) which might trigger bad memories in their heads or even anger.

These things tend to ruin relationships before even beginning.

The second key factor for making someone fall in love with you over text message is honesty. Do not pretend being somebody else because chances are slim it won’t work out well when two persons meet face-to-face.

Also steer clear from using too many flirty emoticons or sexual remarks. Guys think girls who only act sexy over texts aren’t truly interested in them and may stop showing interest once meeting face-to-face.

As you probably already figured out, successful romantic relationships cannot be created within days, weeks or even months period; hence knowing whether person is the one for you usually takes longer time frame than we would prefer to wait.

How to ask someone if they like you over text?

How to ask someone if they like you over How to get someone to like you over text? (10 Tips)

Although it’s not easy to ask a guy or girl if they like you via text. But it depends on whether you are ready for the consequence either to face rejection or to get your heart shattered.

If you have at least some courage, then here is how to do it: how to ask someone if they like you over text? You need two things as follows:

First is Timing, which is very important because choosing a wrong timing can mess up everything. So make sure you know when he/she will be free so that you can send him/her the texts at that time.

The second thing is Texts itself, but don’t use it just randomly without a plan or schedule. Here’s what I recommend; write down what exactly you want to say about your feelings toward them and then wait until a day when you’re both available to talk on any chatting platform.

Then exchange with each other through chat instead of texting before sending any messages. This way has more chance than doing in texting simply because we all seem honest and sincere in video call than on messaging app.

Also read: How to tell if someone doesn’t like you?

But how to ask them if they like you and what words to use? So now we come to the question, what should I tell them? My answer would be to tell him/her only how you feel.

Be true and speak from your heart. Don’t try too hard, keep calm while writing those sentences. What matters most is how you express yourself towards him/her rather than the content itself. If you really love them then let them realize by hearing your voice and seeing your eyes.

Open up to him/her, even though they may reject you, remind yourself that everyone deserves an opportunity to choose their own life path no matter their decisions might lead. (Don’t forget nobody wants regret right?) Give it a shot! Hope my tips work out well.

10 Tips to get someone to like you over text.

Tips to make someone like you over How to get someone to like you over text? (10 Tips)

Here are some ways to get someone to like you through text:

1. Use Smiley Emojis in your text:

A lot of people are quite capable of forming first impressions about another person within seconds.

This helps them make a decision if they want to continue communication or not. So it is important that your first message is eye-catching and interesting enough to leave a strong impression on the other person.

In some cases (depends on both personalities involved) it is enough to keep conversation going even without explaining much about yourself, simply by using well chosen words or emojis. 

Generally, people who use emojis in text are perceived as likeable, kind hearted and trust worthy.

But even though they can be used effectively in your text messages, you still need to be careful not to over do it.

If a text message with loads of emojis makes you look weird, imagine how it look on your partner.

2. Start the conversation about something that person is familiar with:

It’s really important that in your first contact with another person (doesn’t matter if it’s via text, phone or even face to face) you need to find a topic that will make him/her open up and feel comfortable around you.

For example asking about the last movie they saw or their favorite singer is always a good way of making conversation more interesting and lively.

This is particularly useful when both parties do not know each other well yet and so far only have general opinions of each other (if any).

If you ask something that a person cannot answer immediately or on first go, it will cause them some awkwardness which might turn them off.

3. Compliment your text partner, but be sincere about it:

There is a proven fact that if someone hears something positive about themselves, they usually do not tend to disagree with it even if they know it’s false.

On top of that a compliment leaves a good impression and makes the other person more receptive and friendly towards you (especially when done via text).

So go ahead and show your beautiful side by complimenting your new text partner! But keep in mind that compliments will work only when they are genuine, coming from the heart and not just automated responses.

Also read: 15 Signs people don’t like you

4. Be patient; Give your text partner enough time to reply:

If you try to push for instant communication or send more than one message a day, it might only make the other person feel irritated and that can lead to rejection.

On top of that people’s mood fluctuates depending on what is happening in their life right now so be prepared that some days they will feel more talkative while on others it will take them a while before they answer. Just stay calm and relaxed and don’t force anything.

5. Start the conversation with something neutral, rather than starting a conversation about your feelings:

It’s really important that in first contact with another person (doesn’t matter if it’s via text, phone or even face to face) you need to find a topic that will make him/her open up and feel comfortable around you.

The most common mistake people do is opening up a text conversation with their feelings or problems without even greeting the other person properly.

In addition, some of us tend to flood our partners’ inbox with more personal messages during bad days, but then completely ignore them on good days when we are feeling fine.

6. Be polite and friendly in your text messages, but avoid overdoing it:

While we want to talk about our problems and express our feelings, being polite and friendly is definitely a good way of initiating contact with another person.

In addition we tend to use more emojis, smileys and caps lock during bad days because they help us escape negativity by creating an illusion that everything is ok even though that’s not true.

So don’t forget to be friendly in your text messages, but still keep your emotions under control! In addition try not to overdo it with smileys or caps lock since it can become annoying after some time.

7. Share like-minded online articles, music, memes and educational videos:

Social media is an excellent place for people with similar interests or hobbies to connect. So don’t forget to follow your new text partner on social media.

After that don’t be afraid to share some useful online articles about topics both of you have in common. It will definitely ease up conversation and make it more entertaining for both of you. 

You can also take advantage of the knowledge gap by sharing an educational video which will give other person a chance to see you as a knowledgeable individual who knows something they do not know yet.

Also read: Why don’t people like me and how to change that?

8. Show your text partner that you have something interesting in common:

Sometimes we tend to avoid texting people because we know we do not have anything in common with them, but that’s not always true.

In many cases there are so many things which could bring two people together and make them share some laughs while they’re getting to know each other better.

So just be brave and do some research on what places, hobbies or TV shows your new text partner is interested in and start a conversation about that! Just try not to overdo it with small talk since it can become boring very fast (especially when it comes via text message).

But still don’t forget about other tips which are definitely important for successful text flirting as well.

9. Clarify at first whether they like texts or calls or seek real presence:

As I already mentioned before, sometimes we may feel uncomfortable about initiating text contact with people we do not know yet.

But that’s a completely natural feeling. The key is just in overcoming it as soon as possible and being honest with yourself and the other person by clarifying what kind of contact feels most comfortable for you both.

That’s something that should be addressed at the very beginning of your texting journey with another person so there won’t be any misunderstandings later on.

Do not let yourself be trapped into texting only one person if that makes you feel annoyed or stressed out, instead find ways to move things forward and try talking on phone or meeting up in real life so everything will go smoothly.

10. Have fun:

Last but not least – have fun and enjoy your time with your text partner.

Texting is a nice way of getting to know each other better, so don’t forget about good humor and a positive attitude in order for everything to run smoothly.

Even if something goes wrong, try your best not to overthink it or spend too much time thinking about how things could go better next time.

There’s always a chance that they will be better next time. So be confident and have some patience with yourself as well as with other person because making new friends is definitely worth it.

Recommended reading:

Why does nobody like me romantically? (25 Tips)

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Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry. His expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few. To be updated with his latest work, connect with him by following his social media accounts.

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