75+ Early relationship questions to ask your partner

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By: Naveen B

At the beginning of any relationship, there are bound to be some things that you don’t know about your partner. You’ll learn more about them as time goes on.

However, there are some early relationship questions that you should ask your partner in order to get a better understanding of who they really are.

You need to know what questions to ask at the beginning of a relationship.

Once you have decided that you want to date someone or marry someone, it is very important for you to ask these questions so that both of you can also get to know each other deeper.

Also read: 21 Questions for a new relationship, From Deep to S#xy

It’s not just about getting to know someone, it’s also about figuring out whether they’re right for you.

In some cases, it’s not just about getting to know them better, but also seeing if you are right for them.

The following are some important early relationship questions to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend:

Early relationship questions


1. Is there anything that has happened in your past that still haunts and affects the way you live today (e.g., death of a loved one, traumatic event)? If so, what is it and how does it affect you today?

This question reveals what kind of person your partner is and how they deal with difficult situations in their lives.

It also shows how emotionally mature they are and whether or not they can share their feelings with others.

For example, if someone had a bad childhood experience and still holds grudges against certain people for it years later, this will affect how she interacts with other people now.

This question also reveals how much you know about each other. It’s also good to know if there are any skeletons in the closet that may come up later on in the relationship.

For example, if both of you have been married before and have children from previous marriages, make sure both of you are on the same page about how to raise them together as a new family unit.

2. How do we get along when it comes to spending money? Do we both like buying things or saving up for something bigger later on down the road?

Asking this question will help you determine if your financial goals align with each other’s or if there are differences that need to be addressed early on in the relationship before they become major issues later on down the road.

If one person is a saver while another spends freely or vice versa, then it might be best to address these issues sooner rather than later so they don’t cause problems in your relationship down the road.

Also read: 85 Questions to ask before getting into a relationship

3. Do you have any weird habits or quirks that I should know about before things get serious between us (like hiding under the bedcovers at night)?

This question reveals:

A) How open-minded your partner is about talking about difficult issues.

B) How comfortable they are talking about themselves and their feelings with you.

C) How well they deal with emotional stressors and conflict resolution.

4. Do you like being alone or having someone around all the time?

You should know whether your partner likes being alone or having someone around all the time because this will help you understand his personality better.

If he or she likes being alone, then he might be an introvert and if he likes having someone around him all the time then he might be an extrovert.

You should know that this is not an easy question to answer. But, if you want to have a successful relationship, then you need to understand what your partner wants.

If they want to be alone most of the time, then it’s a good idea for you to respect their need for solitude.

On the other hand, if they want you around all the time, then you must make sure that you don’t suffocate them.

5. Do you prefer a long-distance relationship or an open relationship or a monogamous committed relationship?

This question can reveal a lot about how seriously your partner takes relationships and commitment in general.

If they prefer long-distance relationships or open relationships, then this might be an indication that your future together isn’t looking good because there will always come situations where your partner looks for different people who are better than you.

So, it’s a red flag, If both of you have different ideas about relationships and don’t have the same values.

Also read: 70+ Questions to ask yourself before getting into a relationship

6. What do you want from this relationship?

This question can be tricky because it might lead to an awkward conversation.

But if you’re both ready for a serious commitment, it’s important to know what each of you expects from your relationship.

If one person wants a long-term relationship and the other is looking for something casual, then it’s best to put an end to this before things get serious.

7. What is your biggest regret?

This question can be rather personal and revealing, so it’s best to ask only if you feel comfortable enough to do so.

It’s important not to be judgmental when they answer this question because they may regret something they did in the past that they cannot change anymore.

You should also see if they can learn from their past mistakes or not.

8. What do you tell others about my personality?

It’s normal for people to talk about their significant others with their friends and family, but there’s nothing wrong with asking if they discussed you in a negative way or talked about things that bothered them about your relationship.

This shows that you care about what people say about your relationship and that you’re willing to work on improving it together.

It also shows that you don’t take their opinion as gospel truth — especially when it comes from someone else who may have a different opinion about your relationship than yours does!

9. What is the most important thing in your life right now?

This question reveals how your partner prioritizes their life and what they are pursuing at this point in time. Are they more focused on work or family? Do they have time for fun activities or would they rather spend all their time studying?

It also gives you a glimpse into who they are at their core and what they value most in this world.

It’s important to know this because it can help you determine if your relationship will be able to last long term or just short-term fun.

Also read: 10 Questions to ask yourself before breaking up or ending a relationship (Intuitive guide)

10. Would it be easier for you to start over again with someone else after your last relationship failed?

This question reveals how much baggage they’re carrying around from past relationships and whether or not they’re ready for another one.

You need to understand if there is any baggage from previous relationships that could affect yours. There is no point in dating someone who has trouble moving on from past relationships because they have not learned anything from them.

There is nothing worse than meeting someone who doesn’t want to move on from their past relationship because they are still hung up on their ex-partner.

If your partner says yes, then you should reconsider whether you really want to be with them or not.

Because this means that every time you have an argument or some sort of disagreement, it will trigger memories about their ex and make them feel like they’re going through the same thing all over again.

This can lead to resentment and eventually break-ups. So, ask yourself if it’s worth putting yourself through that kind of emotional turmoil.

11. What would you like your ideal partner to be like? What is the most important quality in someone you want to date?

You need to know if the two of you are compatible long before things get serious between the two of you — after all, compatibility is one of the most important elements of any successful relationship.

So, knowing what their ideal partner looks like early in a relationship, helps you understand your partner’s tastes and likes in general.

12. What are your hopes and dreams for the future?

These questions will give you a little insight into what makes this person tick, and it’s easy to talk about yourself when you’re asked about something you love.

But there are some other questions that can help reveal more about your potential partner.

13. What do you want out of life?

This question gets right down to the heart of what each person wants out of life. What do they want to do with their time? What do they want from their relationships? How do they define success?

This is a great way of getting a sense of how compatible you might be with someone else.

Because it helps you understand where they see themselves going in life, which tells you what kind of future they envision for both of you together.

And if those visions don’t line up… well, then maybe this isn’t going to work out between the two of you after all.

14. What was the last thing that made you feel really alive and happy?

We all have moments when we feel truly alive and happy — sometimes more often than others — but what makes us feel like this? What activities are associated with these feelings of aliveness and happiness?

15. What are some things that annoy you about me or that I could improve on to make our relationship better?

Asking this question helps adjust your behavior and also helps you to avoid conflicts.

You can also share your thoughts and feelings about their annoying features and create a funny scenario by sharing each other’s flaws.

Also read: 10 Questions to ask before ending a relationship

Questions to ask early in a relationship


Here is a list of questions to ask early in a relationship:

1. When did you feel we are perfect for each other?

2. How do you decide you can trust Someone?

3. How long does it take to you to understand a person completely?

4. What are the qualities that make a man attractive to women?

5. What is your definition of love?

6. If someone cheated on their partner would it be easier for them to forgive if there was an apology, or if they never knew about it?

7. If our lives were threatened and we had no choice but to choose between saving our child or our partner what would we do? Would we be able to live with ourselves after making that decision?

8. If we could go back in time and change one thing about ourselves what would it be and why? (This question can get pretty deep so tread lightly)

9. How would you describe your relationship with your parents? Your friends? Your siblings? Your exes? Your kids, if you have any?

10. Do you believe in love at first sight or do you think that it takes time to form a connection with someone else and fall in love with them?

If so, how much time is needed to feel that way about someone else? Do you believe in soulmates or is it possible for two people to be happy without finding each other as life partners early on in their lives (or ever)?

People Also read: 200+ Deep relationship questions to ask yourself and others (Persuasive & thoughtful)

Important questions to ask early in a relationship

Here are some important questions to ask early in a relationship:

1. What was the most important lesson you learned from your parents?

2. What was the craziest thing that ever happened to you and why did it happen?

3. What is the craziest thing that ever happened to your family and why did it happen?

4. What is more important for a relationship – physical attraction or emotional connection?

5. If our relationship fails, what would I need to do differently next time?

6. Who do I admire most in this world and why?

7. If we were stuck on an island together, what would we do during those days/weeks/months/years until we get rescued?

8. What is the best thing about our relationship?

9. What makes us different from other relationships?

10. What do we have in common with each other?

11. What are our differences and how do they affect our relationship?

12. Who is your role model and why?

13. What do you want out of this relationship? (And what will make you happy?)

14. If there’s one thing that would make our relationship better, what would it be and why?

15. Do you believe in love at first sight?

16. What is the craziest thing you have done for love?

17. Would you ever date someone who is younger than your child/children?

18. Are you more emotional or logical when it comes to relationships?

19. What is your favorite movie about love & romance? Why this one?

20. Do you have any secrets that you would like to share with me?

21. Are there any dreams that have not come true yet and if so why do you think that is?

22. Can we be friends if we are not s#xually attracted to each other?

Good questions to ask early in a relationship


The following are a few good questions to ask early in a relationship

1. What is the one thing that keeps you moving forward?

2. What makes you feel safe?

3. How do you deal with stress and anxiety?

4. What’s your idea of a perfect day?

5. What makes you feel loved?

6. Would you ever consider cheating on someone, if they have cheated on you first? And why or why not?

7. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?

8. What was your first job like and how did it shape who you are today?

9. If money were no object and you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

10. How do you want to grow as a person over the next five years?

11. If someone handed you $1,000 right now, what would you do with it?

12. Who inspires the most confidence in your life right now and why?

13. Do you have any siblings? How many and how are they like each other?

14. What was your childhood like growing up? Was it happy or sad memories that you have from it?

15. Are you a morning person or a night owl, which do you prefer more?

16. Do you believe in God/religion/spirituality and if so, what is your religion/spirituality like and why did you choose that particular one over others?

17. Do you have any weird habits that your friends or family have picked up on over time?

18. What’s one thing that makes you different from other people in general? Do share something about yourself that not many know about…

19. If we got married, would it be a marriage of convenience or love? Would having children be part of our plans together or would we wait until we’re ready emotionally and financially before starting a family together? 

20. If our marriage was arranged by our parents without us knowing each other beforehand, would we still get along today if we met for the first time now?

Early relationship questions to ask your partner about yourself

Here is a list of early relationship questions to ask your partner about yourself

 1. What was your first impression of me?

2. What do you like best about me?

3. What’s something I could change about myself?

4. If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?

5. When do you feel most loved by me?

6. What’s one thing that makes you feel closer to me than anyone else?

7. If we were to get married, when would be the ideal time for us to get married? And why?

8. Do you think we’ll make it as a long-term couple? Why or why not?

People Also read: 40 New relationship questions to ask yourself and also for him or her (boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner)

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Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry. His expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few. To be updated with his latest work, connect with him by following his social media accounts.

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