200+ Deep relationship questions to ask yourself and others (Persuasive & thoughtful)

Communication is essential to a successful and long lasting relationship.

Before you and your partner move in together, it’s always a good idea to start talking about some of the logistics of your relationship. 

Asking deep relationship questions may help you and your partner learn more about each other.

That’s why I’ve put together this list of 200 deep relationship questions to ask yourself and your partner and make sure you never have an awkward moment again.

Use this list to kick-start long conversations, strengthen the bond between you and your partner, and make your relationship even stronger than it already is.

This list of deep questions about relationships will help you get an idea of what your boyfriend, girlfriend, wife or husband wants out of life? How does he/she spend their time? How much responsibility he/she’s comfortable with, and even what kind of pets they would be willing to have in the home?

Keep this list handy for your deep relationship questions card game. So you can get all your questions out of the way.

 A deep conversation with your partner can make a big difference down the road!

200+ Deep relationship questions

200-deep-relationship-questions

Here is huge list of deep relationship questions:

1. What do we want from each other in this relationship?

Do I want someone who will go out with me when I ask them but never really care about what happens to me? Or does he/she just want someone who can make her feel secure and loved at all times?

This question is important because it shows how much effort both partners put into making the relationship work.

If one person is putting in more effort than the other person then it won’t work out well!

Your relationship is a work in progress. It’s not perfect and it doesn’t have to be. But it does need constant attention and care if you want it to last.

Also read: 10 Questions to ask before ending a relationship

2. How Content Are You With The Amount Of Non-sexual Affection In The Relationship?

It’s important to have a balance of non-s#xual affection and s#xual intimacy in the relationship. 

Your partner may not always be able to give you what you want s#xually, but that doesn’t mean they don’t care about you or love you.

That is why it is important to have a strong foundation of non-s#xual affection, such as cuddling, massages, back rubs, hand holding and kissing.

3. What Does A Spouse Or Partner Mean To You?

The most important thing for spouses to remember is their commitment to one another.

A spouse should never take them for granted and forget how lucky they are to have someone who loves them unconditionally and will support them through anything life throws at them.

4. When we are apart from each other for a few days, how do you feel?

This question has several possible answers.

Some people might say they miss each other when they’re apart, while others might say that time away from the person allows them to reconnect with themselves and gives them space to pursue hobbies.

The key is listening to your own feelings rather than those of others so you can understand yourself better.

Also read: 10 Questions to ask yourself before breaking up or ending a relationship (Intuitive guide)

5. Do you feel that I am good at listening to your needs and wants?

This deep relationship question allows your partner to reflect and think more deeply about whether or not you really hear them

 It is also an opportunity for your partner to share any ways they think you could improve this skill and make them feel loved and cared for.

6. What would our dream vacation be?

Another way to get to know your spouse better. The key is listening to your own feelings rather than those of others so you can understand yourself better.

It is also an opportunity for your partner to share any ways they think you could improve this skill and make them feel loved and cared for.

7. How often do we have s#x?

Sometimes a couple will agree on specific rules about s#x, like only having s#x on weekends or agreeing not to initiate s#x if the other person isn’t feeling well.

Although, it is not necessary to have any relationship rules in the first place.

But sometimes, it’s good to be prepared and have open communication about certain sensible topics just to avoid conflicts in the distant future.

Also read: 70+ Questions to ask yourself before getting into a relationship

8. Is there anything that I don’t know about you that you want to share with me?

An empathetic and understanding partner wishes to know everything about his/her better half in advance to avoid any miscommunication.

The best relationships are ones where both partners communicate openly with each other and try to meet the other person’s needs. 

9. What was the most memorable moment you shared with me?

Relationships are built on memories and moments that stand out.

Whether it was a vacation, trip to a baseball game, or just laying in bed watching Netflix – these moments matter and remind us of our love for each other.

Having a good memory to fall back on when times get tough will always make everything feel okay again.

Also read: 21 Questions for a new relationship, From Deep to S#xy

Questions to deepen relationship

Questions-to-deepen-relationship

Here is a list of Best Questions to ask your partner to deepen your relationship:

1. Should we start a business together?

2. What advice would you give me right now?

3. What do you regret most about our relationship?

4. What worries you the most about our future together?

5. Would you still be willing to work on our relationship even though our relationship is falling apart?

6. What is the best part of being in a committed partnership with me?

7. What will you miss most about me when we eventually break up?

8. What words do you use to describe me?

9. In what ways are we alike and in what ways are we different?

10. What makes you feel secure about our relationship?

11. How often do you need to hear I love you from me?

12. What does I love you mean to you?

13. Can I touch your face while we’re talking?

14. Which word describes how you feel about our relationship?

15. What makes you believe that we are soulmates?

Also read: 75+ Early relationship questions to ask your partner

Deep questions to ask a guy about relationships

Deep-questions-to-ask-a-guy-about-relationships

The following are some deep questions to ask a guy about relationships:

1. What is the difference between love and being in-love with someone?

2. Why is falling in love so hard for some people?

3. How do we know that we fell in love with someone?

4. What makes love so obsessive?

5. Why does love exist in the first place?

6. If a person knows that he loves his partner but does not express it, does it mean that he does not love her?

7. What drives a successful relationship?

8. Does love always need a reason?

9. Is it possible to be in love with two people at once?

10. Can you fall out of love? 

Also read: 40 New relationship questions to ask yourself and also for him or her (boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner)

Deep relationship questions to ask to see if you are in a toxic relationship

Here is a list of deep relationship questions to ask to see if you are in a narcissistic and toxic relationship:

1. Are you more interested in being right than in being happy?

2. Do you find yourself thinking about your ex?

3. Are you having trouble sleeping or eating because of your relationship status?

4. Is there a period of time when you feel good, but then feel bad again?

5. Do you have trouble concentrating on anything other than your relationship?

6. Can you lie about something that has no emotional significance for you?

7. How do you know if someone is cheating?

8. Are there any things that are true in life and which cannot be proven false by any reasonable person who is not intentionally trying to deceive others?

9. Can you share your instagram password with me?

10. What to do, when someone you love breaks your trust?

Also read: 100 Questions to ask yourself about your relationship (Whether it’s healthy or toxic; if you should stay or it’s over)

Deep questions to ask a girl about relationships

Deep-questions-to-ask-a-girl-about-relationships

These are some of the amazing deep questions to ask a girl about relationships:

1. Why do people lie about how much they loved someone else when they break up with them? 2. How can we differentiate between real and fake feelings of love?

3. Why do people divorce even for small conflicts instead of working on them?

4. When should we feel fear in our relationships?

5. When are we most likely to find ourselves infatuated with someone new?

6. Are we more likely to fall in love or get into an affair?

7. How many days should one wait before calling or texting their ex after breaking up?

8. What is true love really like and why are there so many misconceptions about it?

9. Shouldn’t couples compromise themselves more than what they expect from each other in order to make the relationship work better?

10. Why do couples spend so much time together if they are unhappy? 

Also read: 100 Serious relationship questions to ask yourself and your partner (For him or her)

Deep questions about relationships

Deep-questions-about-relationships

Here is a list of deep questions about relationships that make you think:

1. Do parents usually have good insight on who will be a good spouse for their children?

2. What would happen if you got married just because society expects you to get married and have kids?

3. Which is more important: happiness or success in relationships?

4. Which word describes an emotional connection as well as physical attraction between two people: crush or falling in love?

5. When is a crush different from being in love?

6. What is the best way to stop feeling infatuation with someone else when you’re currently committed to another person?

7. Why do people stay in bad relationships rather than go through the pain of ending them?

8. How often should couples talk about serious topics such as marriage and moving in together to maintain intimacy and trust?

9. Who initiates s#x more often in a healthy relationship?

10. How long should couples wait before having s#x again after having had a fight?

Also read: 20 Tough relationship questions to ask yourself and your BF, GF, or partner

Deep questions to ask in a relationship

Deep-questions-to-ask-in-a-relationship

Here is a list of deep questions to ask in a relationship to get to know each other:

1. Is it okay to tell someone that you don’t want to sleep with him anymore?

2. Who wants s#x more–men or women?

3. Why do men initiate s#xual contact less often than women?

4. Who likes getting romantic gestures the most–men or women?

5. What is an easy way to spice things up in the bedroom?

6. What are the consequences of not communicating effectively with your partner?

7. How can I bring back passion into my relationship?

8. How can I save my dying relationship?

9. What’s the right thing to say to a woman when she says she has lost interest in s#x?

10. What percentage of long-term marriages end in divorce? 

Also read: 85 Questions to ask before getting into a relationship

Deep questions to ask your boyfriend about your relationship

Deep-questions-to-ask-your-boyfriend-about-your-relationship

These are some Deep relationship questions to ask your boyfriend

1. Is there anything about me that you don’t like?

2. Do you think cheating is natural for humans?

3. How many s#xual partners have you had?

4. Have you ever been unfaithful in a relationship?

5. What was the worst thing I did in our relationship?

6. If I told you I was pregnant, what would be your reaction?

7. Would you mind if I went on a date with someone else?

8. Do you trust me completely or not at all?

9. Does it bother you when other people flirt with me?

10. Am I too demanding of your time and attention as a partner? 

Also read: 100 Good Relationship Questions

Deep questions to ask your girlfriend about your relationship

Deep-questions-to-ask-your-girlfriend-about-your-relationship

Here are a few Deep relationship questions to ask your girlfriend

1. What has been your favorite experience together as a couple?

2. What makes you angry or upset more often than not?

3. When do you feel most loved by the other person?

4. What is your absolute favorite thing to do with me?

5. How do I make you feel when you are in a bad mood or stressed out?

6. When did you feel that I am the right one for you?

7. What are your best qualities that I love about you and why?

8. Why did we first start dating?

9. What are some of my habits that annoy you?

10. When have I made you feel appreciated?

Deep questions for relationships

Here is a list of deep questions for relationship to reflect, think about and ask your wife or husband:

1. What kind of s#x do you want more from me?

2. When was the last time we made love?

3. Do you think I am attractive?

4. What are three things you like most about me?

5. What should we change in our relationship so that it works better for both of us?

6. What are my strengths as a partner?

7. What are your goals for our relationship?

8. Will you marry me someday?

9. Do you think we should live together?

10. Why haven’t we talked about getting married yet? 

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Deep relationship questions to ask

Here is a list of deep relationship questions to ask yourself and others:

1. Where is your favorite place in the world?

2. What is one trait that makes me different from anyone else you’ve dated before?

3. Which of my qualities do you find attractive?

4. Which of my qualities do you find unattractive?

5. Who is the first person you think of when you wake up in the morning?

6. If there was one thing you could change about our relationship, what would it be and why? 

7. Which s#xual position do you like best with me? 

8. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

9. Do you ever wish that our love making moments were different than they currently are?

10. Why did you choose to marry me?

Relationship skin deep questions

These are some skin deep relationship questions to ask:

1. Where should we go on vacation together next year?

2. What would make you feel loved by me?

3. What do you wish I would change about myself?

4. Why didn’t you bring this up before?

5. What could I do differently to be a better partner to you?

6. Do you think we’re spending enough quality time together?

7. Is there anything I can do to make you happier?

8. What’s one thing I always forget to do for you?

9. Is it OK if I talk about my ex-boyfriend/girlfriend sometimes?

10. Should we get counseling together? 

Deep relationship questions to ask a girl

Here is a list of deep relationship questions to ask a girl:

1. What percentage of all divorces in North America are caused by adultery?

2. How can you show commitment without going overboard and suffocating your partner?

3. Who cheats more, men or women?

4. Can a wife still cheat on her husband if she doesn’t love him anymore but feels obligated to stay with him for financial reasons?

5. How do you recognize that you’ve fallen in love with someone? 

6. What did you see in me that attracted you to me initially?

7. If I told you right now that I wanted out of this marriage, what would your reaction be?

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Deep relationship questions to ask a guy

The following are some deep relationship questions to ask a guy:

1. How can we distinguish between the real and the fake feelings of love?

2. When should we feel fear in relationships?

3. When are we most likely to meet a new person and become attracted to them?

4. What is true love like and why are there so many misconceptions about it?

5. Why do couples spend so much time together when they are unhappy with each other? 

Stimulating deep relationship questions

Here is a list of stimulating deep relationship questions to ask for a better love life:

1. Why do people stay in bad relationships rather than go through the pain of ending them?

2. What are the consequences of not communicating effectively with your partner?

3. What is the right thing to say to a woman when she says she has lost interest in s#x? 

4. How can you show commitment without going overboard and suffocating your partner?

5. What are the steps to a successful first date? 

Deep conversation questions relationship

Here are some deep relationship questions to ask to build deeper conversations with your partner:

1. What are the key differences between dating and hanging out?

2. How do you know if you’re ready to move in with someone?

3. What are some good ways to keep a healthy relationship fresh and exciting?

4. What are the stages of love?

5. What are the benefits of a healthy relationship?

Deep questions about love and relationships

Here are some deep relationship questions about love and life:

1. How can you avoid breakups in a relationship?

2. What is the difference between codependency and cohabitation?

3. Why do some people fall in love naturally and others don’t?

4. What are the benefits of an open relationship?

5. Why do people stay in bad relationships rather than go through the pain of ending them? 

Deep questions in a relationship

These are some of the deepest questions in a relationship:

1. What are the common mistakes in a relationship?

2. What are the indicators of a codependent person?

3. How does a dependent person look to others?

4. What are the consequences of choosing the wrong partner and living with them in a state of unhappiness and despair?

5. If you were single and looking for love, what qualities would you look for in a partner? 

Deep questions to ask friends about relationships

Here is a list of deep questions to ask your friends about relationships:

1. What is true love like and why are there so many misconceptions about it?

2. How long should couples wait before having s#x again after having had a fight?

3. What are the signs of emotional infidelity?

4. What are the signs of physical infidelity?

5. Are emotional affairs always bad for relationships and physical affairs always have negative consequences for the individual who commits them?

Deep questions to ask your crush about relationships

These are some deep questions to ask your crush about relationships:

1. Are all infidelities damaging to a relationship whether emotional or physical, regardless of who commits them?

2. Why do we find ourselves drawn to certain types of partners even though they may be harmful to us?

3. Why is it difficult for some people to get out of unhealthy relationships?

4. Does being emotionally or physically unfaithful ever change how someone feels about their partner (emotionally or physically)?

5. Is intimacy better with one person over another based on personality type (introvert vs extrovert)? 

Deep thought questions about relationships

Here is a list of deep thought questions about relationships to deepen your special bond:

1. Is connection better with one person over another based on marital status (single vs married)?

2. What makes a happy and stable marriage?

3. How to deal with jealousy in a relationship?

4. What are the best tips for maintaining a healthy relationship?

5. How to deal with jealousy in a relationship?

6. What are the best tips for maintaining a healthy relationship?

7. What if I’m in a bad relationship?

Serious deep relationship questions

Here is a list of serious deep relationship questions to ask your partner:

1. If we had to break up, what would be the worst part for you?

2. Have you ever cheated on your previous relationship?

3. What does love mean to you?

4. What do you want in a relationship?

5. What are your expectations from this relationship?

6. Why did you leave your last relationship if it was so good?

7. Would you like polygamy?

8. Who is most important to you: me or my family?

9. What is our definition of infidelity and cheating?

10. When I’m not around, who do you spend time with?

Best deep relationship questions for a successful life

The following are some best deep relationship questions to lead a successful family:

1. What are the steps to a successful first date? 

2. What are the common mistakes in a relationship?

3. What does it mean when someone becomes abusive during an argument?

4. What are the different forms of abuse?

5. What are the signs of an strong and healthy relationship?

6. How to a relationship that’s been abusive?

Deep questions to ask in a new relationship

Here is a list of deep questions to ask in a new relationship:

Questions about family:

What was your childhood like?

Did you have siblings?

What kind of relationship do you have with them now?

How did your parents shape your personality?

Do you still talk to them or see each other often? How does this impact your current relationships?

Questions about friends:

How many friends do you have and what type of friends do you have now?

Do they know about your relationship?

Do they keep up with each other after college/work ends?

Do they get along well?

Are they supportive of your relationship?

Questions about work:

Why did you choose this career path?

What was the most challenging part in getting where you are today?

What are some goals/dreams/ambitions that you want to accomplish in the future (10 years)?

What would make this job better for me?

Deep questions to strengthen a relationship

Here is a list of deep questions to strengthen your relationship and connection:

1. Do you and your partner want the same things?

2. Do you agree on how to achieve those goals?

3. Can you compromise?

4. Are there issues that are so important that they’re worth fighting about? (Money, religion, politics)

5. Do you know what each other’s triggers are?

6. Can you trust each other?

7. Do you feel safe in the relationship?

8. Is there mutual respect between both of you?

9. Does your partner have a history of cheating or lying, even if it was just once or twice in life?

10. Is there a lack of communication between both of you?

If yes then it is very hard for any relationship to work out well in future because communication is one thing which makes relationship strong and another thing which keeps it going smoothly all through life

Deep relationship questions to ask him or her (wife or husband)

Here are some ultimate deep relationship questions to ask him or her:

1. Is it possible to fix a toxic partner?

2. Can a toxic partner turn into a good partner?

3. Can I learn to forgive my toxic partner?

4. What happens if I leave my toxic partner but then regret it later?

5. How will leaving affect me financially?

6. How will leaving affect me emotionally?

7. What are the five ways toxic relationships harm us and what can we do about them?

8. If narcissistic parents divorce and each parent remarries to a narcissist, what will happen?

9. What are the consequences of not communicating effectively with your partner?

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Author
Naveen Bommakanti

Naveen is Experienced Psychology and philosophy Writer, self-help and relationship Coach and thought influencer. He has 7 years of experience in Personal development industry.

Naveen’s expertise as a self-help and relationship Coach has been highlighted through his articles in medium and substack to name a few.

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