We all know what it’s like to start a new relationship. You’re excited about the possibilities, but you also want to make sure that you’re choosing the right person for the long haul. That’s why you need to ask these 21 questions for a new relationship.
These new relationship questions will help you get to know someone on a deeper level and give you insight into what makes them tick.
If you both answer honestly, then you’ll have a much better idea of whether your relationship is going somewhere or not.
Also read: 85 Questions to ask before getting into a relationship
The answers are designed for people who are entering into a new relationship, but they can also be used for existing relationships as well — just change some of the wording so it doesn’t seem like you’re trying to catch them in something.
Here is a list of 21 Questions for a new relationship you need to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend or partner.
- 21 questions for a new relationship
- 1. What is the one thing that keeps you moving forward?
- 2. When did you feel we are perfect for each other?
- 3. How do you decide you can trust Someone?
- 4. What do we need to do to make this relationship work long-term?
- 5. What do you think our biggest challenge will be in this relationship?
- 6. Do you believe in soul mates or do people just get lucky sometimes?
- 7. How long does it take for you to understand a person completely?
- 8. Are you more emotional or logical when it comes to relationships? Introvert or extrovert, what's your overall personality?
- 9. What do you want from this relationship?
- 10. What do you think about me when I'm not around?
- 11. What are your expectations from me?
- 12. What are your strengths and weaknesses? What do others admire about you? What don't they like about you? What do they wish you would change about yourself?
- 13. What are your hidden talents, life skills, career plans, and goals? How can I help you achieve them?
- 14. What parts of our bodies do we need to explore more and how often should we relive our s#xual experiences?
- 15. What makes you happy? How do you define happiness?
- 16. What do I do that makes you happy? (Or vice versa)
- 17. How would you describe your sense of style?
- 18. What do you think is the most important thing in a relationship between two people who love each other deeply?
- 19. What is your type of humor and how do you like to make people laugh? (can be funny stories, jokes, etc.)
- 20. Have you ever been heartbroken before and if so, how did you deal with it?
- 21. What do you think about marriage and relationships in general (not necessarily your own)? Are they important to you? If so, why?
21 questions for a new relationship
1. What is the one thing that keeps you moving forward?
The most basic of all questions, but also the most important. A new relationship is full of unknowns and uncertainties.
So it’s important to get to know each other as soon as possible.
This question for a new relationship will help you understand what makes each other tick and what drives them to succeed in life.
2. When did you feel we are perfect for each other?
This one is an important question to ask because it will tell you a lot about how they felt when they first met you and will give you some insight into how he/she feels about you.
If they say “I knew right away” then it means they were very sure about wanting to be with you from the beginning and their feelings haven’t changed since then (which is great!).
However, if they say “I don’t know exactly when but…” then it means their feelings may have changed over time and this relationship isn’t what they thought it would be (which isn’t so great.)
Either way, this question can give you some insight into their feelings and attachment to you.
Also read: 70+ Questions to ask yourself before getting into a relationship
3. How do you decide you can trust Someone?
Sometimes people have trust issues and they may have trouble trusting anyone or anything.
So if this is the case, it’s important that you find out how they decide whether or not they can trust someone else before committing yourself further into a relationship with them.
A lot of people are scared of being blindsided by someone who hurt them in the past and finding out how much they trust others will help you understand whether or not this person is worth your time and effort or not.
Sometimes, people find it difficult to trust others, especially in a new relationship. This question can help reveal their true intentions and whether or not they are ready for commitment or not.
Also read: 10 Questions to ask yourself before breaking up or ending a relationship (Intuitive guide)
4. What do we need to do to make this relationship work long-term?
You need to know what the future holds. You need to know what you’re getting yourself into before you get in too deep.
There are some questions that will help you figure out whether or not this person is worth the investment of your time, energy, and emotions.
The obvious one is, “Where do you see us going?” but there are other questions to ask as well.
Are you ready for a long-term commitment or is it just a fling?
Have you thought about whether you should get married or not? You need to know if you have similar goals and values. Do you want children? Where would you like to live? What are your career plans?
It is important to be on the same page regarding your plans for the future together.
5. What do you think our biggest challenge will be in this relationship?
This question can help identify potential problems that may arise between the two of you which may cause issues in the future if not addressed early on in the relationship.
It also shows that both of us are aware of these problems and willing to work through them together as a team.
6. Do you believe in soul mates or do people just get lucky sometimes?
You should know whether your partner believes in a soul mate or not. Because it will affect how they view your relationship.
It’s not only about the relationship between two people but also about the relationship between all of us and our world.
You should know that how we see relationships and love is based on our past experiences, our social environment, and our culture.
Some people believe in soulmates, some don’t, it depends on your beliefs and values.
If they think that finding their one true love is a possibility, that can be great. If they don’t, then it may be hard for them to understand why you feel so strongly about them already.
People Also read: 75+ Trick questions to ask a cheater or your unfaithful spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend
7. How long does it take for you to understand a person completely?
This is an important question because if you don’t have enough time for this process, then you can end up making mistakes which will eventually lead to misunderstandings and breakups.
If your partner takes a long time to understand somebody, then this means that he is careful and observant when it comes to relationships or friendships.
On the other hand, if he understands someone quickly and easily then it means that he’s not very observant and doesn’t pay much attention to details which could be useful later on when communicating with this person or group of people.
8. Are you more emotional or logical when it comes to relationships? Introvert or extrovert, what’s your overall personality?
This question will help you understand how well suited your personalities are for each other as well as whether they complement each other.
Emotional people tend to be more sensitive than others and they express their feelings more openly while logical personalities tend to analyze their feelings before acting upon them. Is there any correlation between the two?
Understanding each other’s personality type is crucial when trying to build a strong relationship with someone else as this will help both parties understand each other better as well as what makes them tick (or not).
Emotions are important in any relationship, but sometimes we need someone who has a more rational approach when it comes to making decisions about our future together — especially when it comes down to difficult situations like breakups and divorce proceedings.
You need someone who’s going to keep their cool under pressure and won’t let their emotions get the better of them.
9. What do you want from this relationship?
This question is important because it will help you understand what your partner is looking for in a relationship. It also helps you to figure out how compatible you are with each other.
Does he want something casual and short-term or does he want something that could last a lifetime? Do you want the same thing?
The answer to this question will determine how serious you should be about the relationship, especially if you’re already thinking about marriage and children.
People Also read: 200+ Deep relationship questions to ask yourself and others (Persuasive & thoughtful)
10. What do you think about me when I’m not around?
No one likes to hear that their partner doesn’t care about them as much as they care about them.
There are times when we judge our partners by their behavior when they are around us, but what about when we’re not there?
This question will help you understand how they feel about you when they’re away from you and how much they miss you.
However, it’s important to know where your relationship stands before it develops into something more serious than just dating.
If your partner has nothing nice to say about you when they’re not around, then maybe they’re not ready for a serious commitment yet or maybe they’re just not right for you after all.
11. What are your expectations from me?
How should I behave with others (especially with those who matter most) around us to keep our relationship strong and healthy?
It’s always good to have open communication between partners about their thoughts, emotions, and behavior towards each other and people in general.
This is another important question for couples who want their relationships to last long-term.
Couples need to be honest with each other about what they expect from their partners and how they should behave in front of others so that everyone feels like they’re being treated equally and fairly in the relationship.
Sometimes we don’t get along well with our partner’s family or friends, but it doesn’t mean that we’ll never be able to get along with them; it just means that we need more time to adjust ourselves.
This question will help both of you understand each other better and make things easier in the long run!
12. What are your strengths and weaknesses? What do others admire about you? What don’t they like about you? What do they wish you would change about yourself?
This question is a way for them to open up about themselves and their past experiences.
It also allows them to see if there are any important things that might be able to help improve their relationships with each other, such as jealousy or any other issues they might have experienced with previous partners in their lives (such as cheating).
This allows both parties to understand each other better and hopefully resolve any potential problems before they occur.
13. What are your hidden talents, life skills, career plans, and goals? How can I help you achieve them?
It’s important that you know what each other’s goals are so that you can support each other throughout life.
This also shows how much effort someone is willing to put into their relationship with you.
It shows how much effort they are willing to put into their own lives too! You want someone who wants to work hard for both of your futures together!
This question also allows both partners to open up about their interests and future plans so that they can better understand each other’s dreams and goals for life together.
It also gives each person an opportunity to share with the other what he or she is good at so that they can better support each other as they journey through life together.
14. What parts of our bodies do we need to explore more and how often should we relive our s#xual experiences?
This is one of the most important questions because it helps set romantic expectations early on in the relationship. It also lets your partner know what they can expect from you and vice versa.
You both should be open about what you like and don’t like in bed. This way, you can make sure that your partner is satisfied too.
It’s better to be open with each other about what turns you on, what makes you feel good, and what you would like to try next time.
15. What makes you happy? How do you define happiness?
This one might be hard to answer, but it could help you find ways to make each other happier.
Why do some things make us happy and others don’t?
Is it possible to feel consistently happy without changing our entire lives?
How much of our happiness is about external factors (money, status), and how much comes from within?
16. What do I do that makes you happy? (Or vice versa)
Knowing what makes someone else happy is key to making them happy.
These little things can be simple gestures like making them coffee in the morning or going out for dinner on their birthday… whatever makes them happy is what counts here.
It’s about making each other’s day better! And nothing says “I love you” more than doing something thoughtful for someone else.
Also read: 10 Questions to ask before ending a relationship
17. How would you describe your sense of style?
Do you prefer modern or classic clothing style? What about accessories? Do you have any tattoos/piercings/other body art on display?
If yes, where are they located on your body and what do they look like?
Are there any other things about your appearance that might affect how people perceive you at first sight (short vs long hair, bright vs dark color palette)?
Knowing their sense of fashion helps you get attracted to them and their tastes in life in general.
18. What do you think is the most important thing in a relationship between two people who love each other deeply?
What’s the most important quality someone needs to have if they want to have a good marriage with many children who grow up healthy and happy?
Do you believe in marriage at all or is it just another social construct?
Once you understand your partner’s perspective and realization of reality in a relationship and his or her maturity level then you can easily trust their instincts and follow their guidance.
19. What is your type of humor and how do you like to make people laugh? (can be funny stories, jokes, etc.)
This is an important question because humor is one of the most important aspects of any relationship. It’s essential that both partners can make each other laugh and enjoy being around each other’s company.
You want someone who shares your sense of humor and makes you feel comfortable when you’re around them.
You want to feel comfortable with the person that you are dating and laughing together is a great way to feel connected.
If they don’t have any funny stories or jokes, ask them what they find funny on television or in movies.
20. Have you ever been heartbroken before and if so, how did you deal with it?
It’s good to know how someone handles heartbreak because it will give you an idea of how they’ll handle problems in the future as well as what kind of support system they’ll need from others during difficult periods in their life (like breakups).
You don’t want someone who let themselves spiral into depression following a breakup because this could affect your relationship.
If they have been heartbroken in the past, ask them how they dealt with it or what advice they would give someone who was suffering from heartbreak at that moment.
This shows that you are empathetic towards others’ feelings and care about their well-being even when you aren’t directly involved in their lives.
It also shows that you understand what it feels like when someone breaks up with you — even though this may not be the case.
21. What do you think about marriage and relationships in general (not necessarily your own)? Are they important to you? If so, why?
You should know whether this person is looking for a serious relationship or not. Also, you need to know if they have any goals or plans regarding marriage. This may help you decide whether they are ready for a commitment or not.
This could also give you some insight into their values, beliefs, and overall perspective on life.
For example, if someone says that marriage is not important to them then chances are they are not looking for anything serious.
On the other hand, if someone says that marriage is very important then they might be looking for something long-term.